Up and down

[Boisnix79]

Hi,

I just feel empty and tired. Sleep is improving but my emotions seem ti be up and down WAY more than normal.

Has anyone else experienced this, any ideas why?

[chillamom]

I can  totally relate…if I didn't know better, I would think that I was a rapid cycling bipolar…seriously I can be feeling pretty okay one minute, and I'll walk into the next room or something and start to cry.  I think part of it is we have all been on such a crazy roller coaster that our thoughts and emotions need time to rebalance, and until they do, we have a hard time centering ourselves.  I'll bet also it can be chemical - I don't know if there is science behind it, but perhaps an especially intense relationship makes the neurotransmitters become even more out of whack after the break up than they normally do….and research does show that after a break up, the normal brain basically reacts like a brain going through heroin withdrawal…... wish I could tell you when it would end, but I'm only 5 weeks out myself and everything is still volatile.  Reading other tales on this board helps though…because there is solid evidence that we WILL get through all of this and get our equilibrium back!  Hope it happens soon, take care of yourself and self-soothe in positive ways (I just ate a chocolate bunny, don't think that was the best choice…... )

[Boisnix79]

Your post made me feel not so alone, thanks chillamom

[chillamom]

Boisnix79, hope today was a little bit better!  Most folks on the board say that changes in our own emotions are going to happen incrementally, and as long as something is improving  (in your case sleep!) that's progress!  I'm trying to be mindful…... just sitting with the feelings and memories and letting them flow in and out….the whole "buddhist" thing is unfortunately against my nature, but they say if you practice mindfulness it improves your ability to stay balanced a great deal.  If course, it would help if the ex would stop texting and calling!

[Boisnix79]

Yes I agree, the texts are not helping... . they all seems to have a hidden agenda... . either to make me feel guilty, insufficient or connected to her... . Its like a microcosm of the actual relationship... . its toxic too

Yes todays a little better... . staying busy is helping too.

One thing thats difficuly for me is that other people dont seem to get it... . They try to relate with relationships theyve had that are just hard or challnged... . and they say I know its hard... . THEY dont know what this is like... .  SO I guess feeling a little alone... . These boards really really help my emotions... . its been 7 or 8 days now broken up... . tears just came to my eyes again! yikes haha SERiously feel Bipolar too! This too shall pass

I like Buddhist practice, I may start to listen to dharma talks again... . this one always gives me a healthy view of love... . Listen and tell me what you think of it:)

www.buddhanet.net/mp3/whatislove.mp3