My soon to be ex drove me nuts. Always threatening to leave. Making a big show of moving her stuff in and out of storage. Everything was always my fault. She even came up with a list of ten or fifteen things I needed to keep her at home. Yet Id still like to call and say what the F. Even though I know it wouldnd do any good. This gal is driving me crazy.
It's frustrating when everything is your fault all of the time and there's no acknowledgement of their bad behavior. I'm sorry you feel this way. It triggers emotions of resentment and futility. She's trying to control with her switching things around. A goal could be to depersonalize the behavior. Hang in there.