As many have identified, sex with BPD partners can be exceptional. This, I believe, is not about them, it's about us. They work out what we want and they give it to us and because we are taken in by the intoxicating adulation, we understandably believe that they mean it.
The sex is what I will find hardest to replace. I've had several partners since, and whilst all have been nice people with normal, healthy attitudes, there hasn't been the intensity. However, I'm working in it
So, to my point. My uBPDxgf and I took personal photographs and movies. I still have them. So, to test myself, to see if I was truly making progress in abandoning all feeling for her, I watched some video from the early days, and some from the end days.
The good news? I felt fine. It was like watching a total stranger but what interested me was how she was a TOTALLY different person in 2007 to 2013! I mean, take out the ageing, allow for normal changes and she was like a different person. Facially, body language, accent ( she's from another English speaking nation and had a lovely accent when we met. Unlike most adults who have travelled, she retained virtually zero of her accent but the time we split, but guess what? After the split she got some accent back. What a FAKER!)
Watching those videos also made me realise that the person I miss(ed) was the one I met, not the one I ended up with. Weird how I could not have noticed the changes at the time.
