How do they do it?

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

I am perplexing over how they can be with you and  barely look at you. Use you, then love on you and fall into another fellows arms and have sex within no time. The behavior is just unconscionable to me. And they will boldy lie about their behavior even when they practically put it in your face to intentionally hurt you for loving them so much. This is not supposably psychological but I would disagree because to me it is defenitely insane behavior. Also now I am in the breakup name calling projection phase. She is trying to make me think I need psychological help worse than she does and comments such as I am a freak and cannot get close to any woman cause I lack the skills to do so. I brush these off. i am no ladies man but I feel confident enough and have enough respect for myself not to continue

taking the use and abuse. She is texting me trying to make me out the bad guy when she is one. I need therapy truely and am going to attempt it but just to get over her and not do this again.

[screwedfriend]

I am perplexing over how they can be with you and  barely look at you. Use you, then love on you and fall into another fellows arms and have sex within no time. The behavior is just unconscionable to me. And they will boldy lie about their behavior even when they practically put it in your face to intentionally hurt you for loving them so much. This is not supposably psychological but I would disagree because to me it is defenitely insane behavior. Also now I am in the breakup name calling projection phase. She is trying to make me think I need psychological help worse than she does and comments such as I am a freak and cannot get close to any woman cause I lack the skills to do so. I brush these off. i am no ladies man but I feel confident enough and have enough respect for myself not to continue

taking the use and abuse. She is texting me trying to make me out the bad guy when she is one. I need therapy truely and am going to attempt it but just to get over her and not do this again.

[Emelie Emelie]

I got dumped on my head twice by my exBF and both times he made me the "bad guy".  I left him.  When in reality what happened is he got so verbally and emotionally abusive I walked out.  Both times I called the next day to try and talk it out.  Both times he refused to take me call.  Texted that he was "done".  I was never walking out on him again.  In fact this time he texted me and said now you can tell everyone you dumped me.  (Like that mattered to me.)  I said let's be honest here; that's not what happened.  He can't handle the shame.  He needs to rewrite history so he can still feel good about himself.  Pretty sure that's what your exGF is doing here.

[Frankcostello]

They definitely have to rewrite history no matter what it takes or who it hurts.  My exBPDgf in the end tried so hard to make me look like the bad, even suggested I was the one that needed mental therapy when it was clear she needed it.  She was the one who abused me with her harsh words and threw things at me.  She went so far as to try and get a restraining order against me for stalking when I ran into her two blocks from my house with her new fling.  I ignored my my exBPDgf when I ran into her two blocks from my house with her new fling.  Then because she was so scared of me stalking her, she waited 6 days to file for a restraining order.  My point is they want to rewrite history no matter what it takes or who it hurts to make them try and see themselves as the good person because of their shame.  My exBPDgf was consistently lying about seeing other guys until I ran into her with another guy, then she tried to file a restraining order, glad the judge saw through her and didn't grant it.  They rewrite history because of their shame to make themselves seem better than they are.

[eagle755]

This very f ing post is so f ing spot on. I'm so irritated by how they can do that. I'm trying so hard to get over it. Make you fall in love with them, say the perfect things, act so innocent and loyal, make it seem like they don't even want sex from anyone. Then you find them in the act of cheating and they still deny it?

How do you just sleep with someone you barely know. After two years of a happy relationship. Just over night suddenly decide to hate you? Then blame everything on you?

Its such bullsht

Its been two months since this happened to me, I still can't get past the anger. The rage of having to had go through so much, for so little, so very very little, and to still get screwed over.