Rock Bottom continued - BPD is at psychiatric hospital and they won't let her go

[funfunctional]

I am starting to feel a glimmer of hope that my sister will finally be helped.   She hit rock bottom and a friend of hers talked her into checking into psychiatric hospital.   She is there and "detoxing" from all the alcohol and pills... .etc.    The place is making her stay till Thursday as she says "against her will".    She is still not talking to me or my dad but only to her x husband.  Thank god for him and I finally was able to speak to him covertly yesterday to at least find out what is happening.  She only gave him legal right to call.   She has to fix this or she may see custody problems.    Her x husband and his family are so supportive of her but x husband is starting to get burnt.      The stuff he told me about her I apparently have only seen "mild" stuff compared to what he has been thru.     

I really hope her co-addict boyfriend stays away.    I wish there was a legal way to keep him away.

Does anyone know if she can be kept longer against her will?   I am worried she will go back to alcohol.  They are going to work out an outpatient program with her.     I hope this helps her cause I could see where she was headed and it was not good.  "dead".

[HappyChappy]

Sorry to hear about your sister. But they say you have to hit rock bottom before you mend, as a BPD and as an alcoholic. So hopefully this is rock bottom. Maybe you could bribe your sister to stay in longer.

[finchfeather]

Wow, that sounds really intense. I'm sorry this is happening, but I hope that your sister gets the help that she needs.

From what you posted, it sounds like your sister is probably on a 72-hour hold at the moment? I know a little bit about this because my brother (who has bipolar disorder) has been hospitalized on this kind of hold before. I think that it depends on the state, so you may need to look up what the laws are where your sister lives, but I know that where my brother lives, 72 hours is the longest the hospital can hold someone involuntarily without going to court and getting a longer order. The court may only be able extend the order (IME anyway) if they feel that the patient will be a danger to themselves or to other people.

Hopefully, this will be a moment of clarity for her and she'll see that she needs to change and get treatment or risk losing some really important things in her life. I'll be pulling for her.

How are you holding up with all of this? Sending you lots of support.

[funfunctional]

Thanks HappyChap & Finch,

I am holding up ok.   Yesterday I took a mental health day for myself and hung with my husband.  He was off from work.    Spent some time on the phone.  I made the decision to back off after my sister was pickign a fight with me 5-6 weeks ago and it hurts and makes me feel helpless but it is of benefit to her.   She needed to get the message that what she was doing was not supported by either my dad or I.      She took someone back into her life that has been nothing but trouble - addict - liar - thief.

I am feeling a bit lonely now myself but I think my emotions are mixed.  Not sure it is a "lonely" feeling or more just emptiness.    When you grow up in a disfunctional family and see your two siblings such a mess and not changing or maturing normally or stepping up it hurts.    I see it as tragic.   Sister is so dark - her house dirty - it breaks my heart to see her young children live with this.  My husband has a severe BPD mother and although nothing is "going on" with her right now as we are not in touch it still affects my relationship with her daughter/my SIL.   My SIL is wrestling her own demons but is "up and down" with me.   One minute she shows interest in having a relationship and next minute "no".   I apparently am bashed daily when her BPD mom calls and am the source of many fights between them.   SIL shut her down for 3 years but is back "on".  My husb. shut her off over 3 yrs ago.    Expressing that I get it from "all angles" and just want to be happy.

However, I am doing ok.   I will be ok.   I will continue to be positive and stay healthy and focus on the things.