Let her go for the moment.
Most recently the two of you have been living together by default rather than by choice. But if you let her find her own place to live, then in a few months both she and you can decide how your relationship is to be defined.
I think you've got to go ahead and risk the possibility that she will move on to someone else once she is in a stronger position. Biting that bullet sooner rather than later is painful but healthy.
I am agreeing with you and need to find strength to carry through. I should share what precipitated sudden fallout:
Gf had been expressing how uncomfortable she was at my house with my son etc for a while. About 2-3 weeks ago gf asked if I could find her an apt and I said no can't afford it etc but laid out some ideas to work through problem (therapy, more activity on her part... .get her out of the house etc). Then her nephew visited with his gf who is a psychologist with master's degree. gf shared her "fears" with the psychologist and was told and I quote "... .get into therapy and involve yourself." So I preached patience to gf and encouraged this path and see what happens.
On Monday of this week I went on facebook... .I usually avoid fb and what I about to write might sound like one of those seeeeee fb destroys relationship deals haha.
We had listed our r/s on fb a while back... .I initiated this even though I hate fb as a test in a way. On Monday when I logged into fb I noticed she had taken my name off of the r/s line and was just listed as the generic "in a relationship" on her page.
I didn't get too annoyed right away but she had been behaving weird and said was out of an anxiety med so I cut her slack even though she was being super annoying and demanding. The next morning I asked her about deleting my name from the fb r/s line and her answer really bothered me... .she said it was "naco" to have names listed. Naco is some kind of sonoran spanish slang for trashy/low class etc.
Anyways... .I was busy with work and put it out of my mind but her answer didn't make sense and was slowly eating at me and I pretty much avoided/ignored her for the day.
So I got home and she has her bags packed blah blah. On the way to taking her her relative's apt I told her I was mad about taking my name off the f/b r/s line and said it was disrespectful and if I had wanted to do such a thing for any reason including thinking listing her name was "naco" I would have first discussed it with her out of common courtesy and respect.
... .now let's fast forward to tonight. Through the miracle of technology and utilizing some of my ex-military intel and amateur detective skills I pulled up my phone records on Verizon and looked at the usage on her phone, and was able to ID 95% of everyone she has called or texted in the last 30 days (she has a small social circle so was not too hard).
Looking at the records I see she began texting 3 old dates last Friday night while I was at my business meeting. Looking at fb I see she added the 3 old dates as "friends" in the same time range as removing my name from the r/s line on fb.
Looking further at the phone/text records she texted them all on the 19th... .the day she left... .too bad for her I can deduce by the pattern of contacts she initiated between the 15th and the present there does not appear to be much interest from the 3 ex dates.
Now that she has left and is soon to be homeless she is demanding an apt or else r/s ends. It appears she is at the end of the line as none of the 3 ex dates are going to take her in.
Well... .I am going to try to sleep on this but it looks like I will be confronting her in the morning and getting a samsung galaxy s6 from her... .she just doesn't know it yet.
Yes... .you probably know by now I will not close the door on her but I see a homeless shelter in her immediate future.
