She never looked back when splitting ways

[Depression = 72% of members]

We had a long distance relationship and met and said goodbye at airports. When the moment arrived to split ways and the ussual crying/hugging was done she never looked back/waving hands/blowing kiss... .when walking away... .Nothing like that. I Always find that so odd, never met anyone who does this. Anyone experienced this behaviour?

I read so many simularities on this site and somehow it doesnt matter if i keep questioning myself if she is a pwBPD or not because eventually i tollerated her bad behaviours and treating me poorly much too long. Which is something no partners or friends should keep up with.

And still after so long i have this little voice inside my head from time to time who says: "maybe she isnt that bad/disorderd as how you see her now"

How someone behaves is their karma and nothing you can do about it, how i react is my karma. Thats keeps me in ME!

[icecream]

We had a long distance relationship and met and said goodbye at airports. When the moment arrived to split ways and the ussual crying/hugging was done she never looked back/waving hands/blowing kiss... .when walking away... .Nothing like that. I Always find that so odd, never met anyone who does this. Anyone experienced this behaviour?

I read so many simularities on this site and somehow it doesnt matter if i keep questioning myself if she is a pwBPD or not because eventually i tollerated her bad behaviours and treating me poorly much too long. Which is something no partners or friends should keep up with.

And still after so long i have this little voice inside my head from time to time who says: "maybe she isnt that bad/disorderd as how you see her now"

How someone behaves is their karma and nothing you can do about it, how i react is my karma. Thats keeps me in ME!

[tim_tom]

Lmao... This just happened to me the other day, she's sent me a few lovey emails in the past week. Yesterday, she came to get some of her stuff with her friend and had to leave quickly cause she had a friend with her. When she left I watched her. Never turned back and looked at me, at our house, our dog, she lived here for over a year, we picked out the dog together, red did most of the house. And she never turned back, I thought I was making a bigger deal out of it then it was, so I'm glad to see this thread on here today.

You'd think a normal person would look back, maybe pause for a second. Wave good bye. Something.

[pieceofme]

i had the same experience, but in a very different situation. after his first rage, my ex walked out on me. sobbing, i followed him to the door, and watched his back as he walked away without a word. he never looked back once. i always thought it was beyond cruel how he could leave me like that.

[Split black]

I have to laugh... .I left and moved away... .then came back for a short tryst. Both times, she didnt even speak to me the actual day I drove away... .got some texts... .first time she said I love you now that your gone, and I miss you. I was so thrilled, thought I broke thru... .  one week later I called, she acted as if I was bothering her... a total stranger... .then texts... .naaa I dont miss you.  Nice. 

Second trip... .saw her for 4 days... .  she needed money ... .sex for money. She was basically devaluing and nasty the whole time. ugh  Not even a good bye when I left... .got a text several days later asking me to wire her money for boots because is was getting cold out... .

Im in NC now... .dreading the Thanksgiving trip. Im hoping to have the stones by then to not see her. She will always see me when she needs something... .because Im a tool to be used.

[Infern0]

Funny enough when I left I never looked back.

It took everything i had but I was like no,  not doing it. Like I say it was really horrible but I had to do it to get some sanity back.

[Blimblam]

You have to remember with these girls it's about need control and winning

[Chasing_Ghosts]

Funny enough when I left I never looked back.

It took everything i had but I was like no,  not doing it. Like I say it was really horrible but I had to do it to get some sanity back.

Ditto. I dont think i couldve handled anything or be where im at if i wouldve stayed connected at first the way she wanted to.

Clarity calls fourth. Its our only defense against the madness...

[Take2]

i had the same experience, but in a very different situation. after his first rage, my ex walked out on me. sobbing, i followed him to the door, and watched his back as he walked away without a word. he never looked back once. i always thought it was beyond cruel how he could leave me like that.

I had that scenario occur at work in the parking garage of all places.  Sadly, multiple times.  That someone who allegedly loves you can drive away from their partner sobbing and not look back is mind boggling.  But in retrospect, not the worst thing he ever did by far.  That statement says a lot!  (as does the fact that I allowed myself to experience it multiple times... .)   

[Split black]

i had the same experience, but in a very different situation. after his first rage, my ex walked out on me. sobbing, i followed him to the door, and watched his back as he walked away without a word. he never looked back once. i always thought it was beyond cruel how he could leave me like that.

I had that scenario occur at work in the parking garage of all places.  Sadly, multiple times.  That someone who allegedly loves you can drive away from their partner sobbing and not look back is mind boggling.  But in retrospect, not the worst thing he ever did by far.  That statement says a lot!  (as does the fact that I allowed myself to experience it multiple times... .)   

Yes at the end of the day... .the mind boggling part is having allowed it soo many times.  Fog, once again... .seems to clearing. Having a thousand mile plus difference really really helps... .   it feels like a dull toothache now... and not all the time. Not all the time at all.  Acceptance and I love the saying what you resist persists.  There are just way too many people of the opposite sex that are attractive and have the ability to think normally.

[Split black]

You have to remember with these girls it's about need control and winning

Plus, its about your use... .as an object. If you are not near them they cant use you. The only way to win is not to play... . 

[myself]

Plus, its about your use... .as an object. If you are not near them they cant use you.

They can use you as a scapegoat, for the rest of their life if they choose to.

That's another way many of us are still being clung to/abused from afar.

We don't have to be there anymore, or even know about it, but it happens.

[martymcfly5]

They can use you as a scapegoat, for the rest of their life if they choose to.

That's another way many of us are still being clung to/abused from afar.

We don't have to be there anymore, or even know about it, but it happens.

Scapegoating taken to a new level: My uBPD created a fake facebook page with my real name. The posts are very strange... .she is projecting onto that page. At first there was raging towards me. She has since removed these (which I don't understand). Tone of page is void of rage and backwards remorse? This has been going on since I left her. That was July 1st.

[Take2]

Yes at the end of the day... .the mind boggling part is having allowed it soo many times.  Fog, once again... .seems to clearing. Having a thousand mile plus difference really really helps... .   it feels like a dull toothache now... and not all the time. Not all the time at all.  Acceptance and I love the saying what you resist persists.  There are just way too many people of the opposite sex that are attractive and have the ability to think normally.

That statement underscores the addiction on our part... .   a thousand miles must help tremendously!  Glad you are doing better !   

[Blimblam]

Plus, its about your use... .as an object. If you are not near them they cant use you.

They can use you as a scapegoat, for the rest of their life if they choose to.

That's another way many of us are still being clung to/abused from afar.

We don't have to be there anymore, or even know about it, but it happens.

This makes a lot of sense.  I think that we do this too with our exs, the scapegoating.

[Take2]

Plus, its about your use... .as an object. If you are not near them they cant use you.

They can use you as a scapegoat, for the rest of their life if they choose to.

That's another way many of us are still being clung to/abused from afar.

We don't have to be there anymore, or even know about it, but it happens.

This makes a lot of sense.  I think that we do this too with our exs, the scapegoating.

We do, we do... .   it's helpful to a point... .and then it's time to just focus on us so we can let go and move forward... .   

[Blimblam]

Plus, its about your use... .as an object. If you are not near them they cant use you.

They can use you as a scapegoat, for the rest of their life if they choose to.

That's another way many of us are still being clung to/abused from afar.

We don't have to be there anymore, or even know about it, but it happens.

This makes a lot of sense.  I think that we do this too with our exs, the scapegoating.

We do, we do... .   it's helpful to a point... .and then it's time to just focus on us so we can let go and move forward... .   

I think it does serve a purpose though.  When I find myself doin it I seem to go through an extremely painfull process that seems to last weeks. Then I realize it's a part of me and gain some new insights. 

It seems it is my unconcious trying to tell me something through projection. Then deciphering the message and recognizing my own projection.  As it is happening though I am extremely confused though and I feel like screaming.

[sirius]

My exgf was also having problem saying good bye. Whenever i send her to the airpor and i said i want to get down to see her go, she told me not to as it will spoil her day and she couldnt take it. She always jumped out of the car towing her luggage and not look back and tells me not to call after her.

Fast forward 5 or 6 years later, each morning after our coffee i will kiss her on the forehead and watched her go to work, standing there with my dog, i will wave gd bye to her, she would wave back but reluctantly and speeding off.