hi worndown. i think it's impossible to say that all pwBPD have health problems. my wife has a weight problem that is connected with her BPD, but her mother (who surely also has it) is very trim, and so far as i ever heard has no particular physical issues (emotional issues is another story!). there are common traits that characterize BPD, and according to DSM a person must have 5 of 9 traits to be diagnosed with it. some clever one (i'm no good at math) once calculated how many different combinations that could give. my point being that they're individuals too. not every person with BPD will share my wife's taste for american folk art, for example.
what were your gf's behavior traits?
1. She told me she loved me within the first few dates . I knew something was "off" but I had no knowledge off BPD at the time, plus she was attractive and liked me so I went along with it.
2. She would never stop taking about me to her friends and family in the idealization phase. almost to the point of obsession
3. The first time I ever hung up the phone on her about a month into the relationship she freaked out and left me a voicemail saying she was going to the hospital despite nothing being wrong with her
4. I know for fact her mother abused her when she was very young. I also know Her stepfather killed himself and her biological father walked out on her
5. She spoke about marriage/kids within the first two 1 1/2 months of knowing her and tried to get pregnant with me several times.
6. Used to complain about how depressed she was and how all I Was doing was adding more "loneliness" every tie we fought
7. She admitted she had an emotional affair with a married man before she met me and enjoyed going for emotionally unavailable men.
8. Tried to isolate me from my friends, stalked me, accused me of cheating, and would pick fights out of nowhere every time the relationship seemed to be going smooth.
9. compulsive spending and she stole money from me on several occasions
10. she was extremely smooth around people , flirtatious, and manipulative.
11. Even after the relationship was over she tried making me feel guilty by saying that I was verbally abusive and "let her get away" (Im thinking BPD with a touch of NPD perhaps?)
12. Loved me one day, hated me the next day, she was EXTREMELY emotional and would cry over something as small as a simple joke.
13. Hardly ever admitted she was wrong.