Surprised and sad about how BPD friend is alienating her kids

Deelakehouse

Fewer than 3 Posts

Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1

Surprised and sad about how BPD friend is alienating her kids

« on: December 17, 2014, 09:04:58 PM »

:'( Childhood friend is alarming me. Finally decided to share with her adult daughter what I'd suspected & referred child to this site. Feeling scared that I've betrayed my friend. Relieved the girl is seeking independent counselling/validation with a therapist. Hate to see either suffering but feeling so, so guilty and meddlesome. Just couldn't bear to watch it anymore without reaching out to the child. Guess I identify with her cause of my own childhood. Glad to find this group.


	Logged

ftm0514

Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 8

Re: Surprised and sad about how BPD friend is alienating her kids

« Reply #1 on: December 18, 2014, 09:50:51 PM »

Speaking from the position of an adult daughter suffering the roller coaster of a BPM mom, it would have been amazing and wonderful had one of my mother's friends talked to me about my mother's dysfunction. It's very hard as a child (even adult child) of a BPM mother to feel validated because often people outside the immediate family don't see that side of my mother. Validation from an "outsider" is huge, and very healing.


	Logged

rebl.brown

Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 58

Re: Surprised and sad about how BPD friend is alienating her kids

« Reply #2 on: December 18, 2014, 11:02:21 PM »

You totally did the right thing, no matter what happens, the daughter can turn on you just as the mother might. Don't worry about that. Stand in the truth. Hopefully this daughter will escape and your telling the truth may make the difference. It's never wrong to do the right thing.


	Logged

P.F.Change

Retired Staff

Offline

Gender: Female

What is your sexual orientation: Bisexual
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Relationship status: Divorced
Posts: 3398

Re: Surprised and sad about how BPD friend is alienating her kids

« Reply #3 on: December 29, 2014, 06:52:06 PM »

Welcome to bpdfamily, Deelakehouse.

It sounds like you are really concerned for your friend's daughter. What kinds of things is your friend doing that are alarming you? What was your own uprbinging like?

We're glad you're here, and hope to hear more from you.

Wishing you peace,

PF


	Logged

“If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading.”--Lao Tzu

Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1] Go Up

BPDFamily.com > Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD > Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD > Topic: Surprised and sad about how BPD friend is alienating her kids

« previous next »



Diagnosis + Treatment The Big Picture Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ] Five Dimensions of Human Personality Think It's BPD but How Can I Know? DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders Treatment of BPD [ Video ] Getting a Loved One Into Therapy Top 50 Questions Members Ask Home page Forum List of discussion groups Making a first post Find last post Discussion group guidelines Tips Romantic relationship in or near breakup Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD Sibling or Parent with BPD Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD Partner or Spouse with BPD Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship Tools Wisemind Ending conflict (3 minute lesson) Listen with Empathy Don't Be Invalidating Setting boundaries On-line CBT Book reviews Member workshops About Mission and Purpose Website Policies Membership Eligibility Please Donate