Did Your Ex Text alot

[NYMike]

I was thinking about how this whole texting affected me with her.Everyone in my life talks to me on the phone and answers the phone.

With her it was all texting.I would call her and she would not answer and then text me.It drove me insane why she did this.Maybe I don't want to know.It seemed so sneaky and she played that head game with me when I told her to please answer the phone so we can talk.She never stopped.It was all this stupid texting.Right down to the bitter end she was texting and secretive.

I am not big on texting.Did I over-react to this.Was I insecure,nervous,or not trusting her.I am curious because I swear I will never text again.I hate texting after this.

The reason I ask is because it caused me so much insecurity and insecure thoughts.I was wondering if this was my issue or was she up to no good.It just didn't make any sence to me.Then she would fight with me if I asked her to please call me and talk like normal people.

Any thoughts.?

[Xidion]

My ex was on her phone 24/7. She could have been out with friends, or shopping, or cleaning our apartment.  But she say around on her phone all day. And she was a texter yes. Especially to other guys toward the end... .

[Infern0]

Yeah absolutely.

Texting or Facebook messaging.

She would answer a call and would sometimes call me but she preferred to send messages and she sent a lot.

[EaglesJuju]

Mine texts all the time as well.  Although he avidly texts, I think texting is the common thing for most people.  The only person that does not text me, is my grandmother.

[patientandclear]

After our breakup, my ex no longer wanted to talk on the phone.  It was clear that it was a pretty intense aversion, not disinterest.  Texting was his favorite, safest form of communication.  Immediate response for him, but with enough of a delay in responding to me that things he didn't want to reveal wouldn't inadvertently slip out.

[going places]

Have you ever seen a 13 year old boy at the mall on his cell phone?

Totally engrossed... .like it was the most amazing thing ever?

And then when someone interrupts him? He loses his mind, stomps his feet, turns his back to who ever is talking to him so he can continue on his phone?

Yep.

That's my ex.

His cell phone and his computer, are his 'reality'.

He is incapable of having a normal face to face real conversation; much less a genuine relationship.

Just his cell phone and his computer.

So sad. Our adult children are AMAZING people, and he's missing out on so much.

His loss... .

[Deeno02]

Texted the ___ out of me and others. Used to yell at me for not calling her, so I started to. She never reciprocated calling me! Just texts from hell. Which, as I started losing cool points, slowly diminished to the point where I would on purpose, wait to see when she got around to texting me good morning. It used to be right off the bat, as I get up early to go to work. Then is became later and later until I began to intiate it first... .. What a freaking joke.

[evilpepsi]

I was thinking about how this whole texting affected me with her.Everyone in my life talks to me on the phone and answers the phone.

With her it was all texting.I would call her and she would not answer and then text me.It drove me insane why she did this.Maybe I don't want to know.It seemed so sneaky and she played that head game with me when I told her to please answer the phone so we can talk.She never stopped.It was all this stupid texting.Right down to the bitter end she was texting and secretive.

I am not big on texting.Did I over-react to this.Was I insecure,nervous,or not trusting her.I am curious because I swear I will never text again.I hate texting after this.

The reason I ask is because it caused me so much insecurity and insecure thoughts.I was wondering if this was my issue or was she up to no good.It just didn't make any sence to me.Then she would fight with me if I asked her to please call me and talk like normal people.

Any thoughts.?

I live and die by the text message. Texting has been my main mode of communication since 2001. I go through several thousand every month. That's normal for most people that I know. My ex didn't text nearly as much as I do, but I converted her, hahaha.

[billypilgrim]

Have you ever seen a 13 year old boy at the mall on his cell phone?

Totally engrossed... .like it was the most amazing thing ever?

And then when someone interrupts him? He loses his mind, stomps his feet, turns his back to who ever is talking to him so he can continue on his phone?

Yep.

That's my ex.

His cell phone and his computer, are his 'reality'.

He is incapable of having a normal face to face real conversation; much less a genuine relationship.

Just his cell phone and his computer.

So sad. Our adult children are AMAZING people, and he's missing out on so much.

His loss... .

Yep.  This describes my ex perfectly.  Totally engrossed in social media.  Everyone's life looks soo much better than hers.  She checked obsessively.  It really is sad - what is it do they think is out there that is better than what they could have had?

[going places]

The whole "Grass is Greener" mindset.

Ex was a 'never enough, not good enough' kinda guy.

That's his problem, not mine!

SO glad God has given me the opportunity to live a 'healthy life', free from the abuse and trauma!

[RedDove]

In the beginning when he was courting me, now known of course as "idealizing" me, he sent sweet, smart and intriguing emails. Some were lengthy at times, but became very deep after we officially started dating.

After our first date, he emailed a "Top Ten" List, as in the Top Ten things he loved about our first date.    Believe it or not, he also emailed a Top Ten List of what he loved about our love making after the first time we were intimate. 

Then the texting started, non stop! He gets up early at 4:30am for a long commute to work. Every morning when I got up for work at 6:30am I'd have a "Good Morning gorgeous, or beautiful, or sexy, or love of my life." It was sweet in the beginning. But, later became annoying! Just like a teenager, if I didn't respond right away he'd text again and again, each text getting more desperate. I know now that he was afraid I was abandoning him. Didn't know he had BPD at the time.

He also texted to cancel and/or blow off plans with me. I'd cook a nice dinner and then receive a text 10 minutes before he was due to come over saying "he wasn't up to it tonight". I'd call him and he wouldn't pick up the phone. He rarely ever called me to talk to me. I began to detest texting. He used it because he was a coward and couldn't handle difficult situations or conversations. He also used it to deceive and cheat on not only me, but Im sure other women as well.

He kept his phone hidden all the time. I used to wonder where it was when he slept over. I checked his pant pockets when he was sleeping one night and no phone. I presumed it was safely "hidden" in his car.

The last few months the good morning and excessive texts throughout the day/night diminished. I found I had to initiate by texting him. It took him hours before he texted back and usually it was vague, one-word answers. He blew me off 3 weekends in a row via text! That's when I began playing detective. I soon uncovered his lies and cheating with the other woman who he had in the wings being primed for a month! I confronted him and he admitted to having BPD.

The worst part of his deception via texting... .he came by unexpectedly to see me on a Sunday. I was so happy because he never surprised me like that. We chatted about commitment, made vacation plans for the summer, told me I was the love of his life AND he he couldn't imagine his life without me in it. He was texting someone whilst sitting next to me and claimed at the time it was his best friend having issues with his girlfriend. After I ended it with him, I learned the truth... .he cancelled plans with me the night before (Saturday night) because he was out on a 2nd date with the OW. He was texting the OW about what a wonderful date they had whilst sitting right next to me! At the same time making plans with me, telling me I was the love of his life! Now that is sick and crazy BPD behavior.