My uBPDh rewrites every story to make him either the victim or the victorious, depending on what he's going for.
Maternus, that's a pretty awful response from a mother! I'm sorry to hear that.
Don't feel sorry for me. It's a kind of relief for me to accept that my family is dysfunctional and disordered. For my whole life I thought I was wrong, when I felt empathy with others, when I thought, that it is good to have values and to keep boundaries around them. I was programmed, to fell in love with a pwBPD. But that is a program, you can delete, once you got through it. When I look at my family, I must say, I had great luck not to be a Cluster-B-personality myself.
I hear ya! I think about how much MORE messed up I could be and marvel... .but that's still a sucky response from a mother. I've worked hard to try to distance myself from taking on the hurts of others while still remaining empathetic. It's hard for me, I have been a total emotional sponge for most of my life, up till the past couple of years. But being a mom and grandma myself it's hard for me to picture the stuff some mothers say to their kids. Just like it's hard for me to believe one of my grown daughters believes the lies my uBPDh has told her, after knowing me for the years she has. (we brought her into our family at 16 as a foster child out of a very very harmful family situation where the father held all the power... .)
Elpis