I just figured out that my husband of three years probably suffers from BPD

[Yosefshaya]

He won't go to therapy with me. We have two beautiful sons. I am at a real crossroads. He is absolutely unwilling to make amends. Uses the kids to hurt me. I am extremely frightened of divorce but believe I may have no choice. To those of you who divorced, what point did you put in the towel? For those of you not divorcing, why not and how do you cope?

Thank you

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[waverider]

 

Whatever the future holds it will be long and hard to get to a good place.

You cant make him do anything. You can only control what you do. Hopefully creating an environment where he can decide if he wants to join you or not.

Therapy will not work unless he wants to go, and couples therapy rarely works as it turns into a blame and denial session

Have you read through the lessons over to the right?>>

Before you start worrying about what the end options are, there are a lot of steps you can take to protect yourself now.

Is there any particular aspect that is worrying you the most?

[formflier]

He won't go to therapy with me. 

You should still go... .you need to get a support system for you... .and get yourself educated about the options you have.

Then you can make choices... .choices give you back the power... .

This will be a lot of work... but I think you can do it!