24 hours and he is supposedly my "best relationship prospect"

[Family Court Strategies: When Your Partner Has BPD OR NPD Traits.]

So for anyone needing a laugh tonight. I long ago closed my POF account. It does still exist but with no photos and only a message thanking everyone who wrote and wishing them happy fishing. However last Saturday my very dear friend started a new POF account for me as she met her fiancee there in 48 hours no less. She choose the photos, helped write the profile and encouraged me to complete all the chemistry, personality and relationship needs surveys. Then she fed me cheesecake and tea and encouraged me to wade back out into the water and communicate with a few men. She feels I have to start somewhere. It felt horrible and I hated it but I know that most things I learn to love start with me hating them. (IE running, weights, sushi, painting, biochemistry etc.)

We were very honest in my test responses and what I wrote. I was as sincere and straight forward as I could be. I immediately had responses (of course) and tried to muster some enthusiasm for the replies. I really wasn't feeling it but I wanted to start somewhere and that was as good a place as any to start practicing my social skills.

So the next morning I was feeling much more positive about the experience and thought this isn't so bad. There still seem to be some decent people out there. So I opened the lap top and signed in and ta da! There is my number #1 Ultra match as the most suitable person for me to have a relationship with is my exfiancee wBPD. 

Yup I'm not kidding. He had already viewed my profile so I didn't see much point in closing the account. I just laughed and laughed and laughed. I am either most suited to a seriously mentally ill jerk or he is able to lie well enough to fool the POF system. Mind you I don't think that would take to much. No matter. I have already chatted with a few nice people and feel better about just being me and not worrying about it all to much.

I thought I would share the story to give you all a giggle in your day. I hope you are all well and as happy as you can be on your road to recovery. I am heading out to walk in the beautiful evening air. Peace love and hugs to you all.

[hope2727]

So for anyone needing a laugh tonight. I long ago closed my POF account. It does still exist but with no photos and only a message thanking everyone who wrote and wishing them happy fishing. However last Saturday my very dear friend started a new POF account for me as she met her fiancee there in 48 hours no less. She choose the photos, helped write the profile and encouraged me to complete all the chemistry, personality and relationship needs surveys. Then she fed me cheesecake and tea and encouraged me to wade back out into the water and communicate with a few men. She feels I have to start somewhere. It felt horrible and I hated it but I know that most things I learn to love start with me hating them. (IE running, weights, sushi, painting, biochemistry etc.)

We were very honest in my test responses and what I wrote. I was as sincere and straight forward as I could be. I immediately had responses (of course) and tried to muster some enthusiasm for the replies. I really wasn't feeling it but I wanted to start somewhere and that was as good a place as any to start practicing my social skills.

So the next morning I was feeling much more positive about the experience and thought this isn't so bad. There still seem to be some decent people out there. So I opened the lap top and signed in and ta da! There is my number #1 Ultra match as the most suitable person for me to have a relationship with is my exfiancee wBPD. 

Yup I'm not kidding. He had already viewed my profile so I didn't see much point in closing the account. I just laughed and laughed and laughed. I am either most suited to a seriously mentally ill jerk or he is able to lie well enough to fool the POF system. Mind you I don't think that would take to much. No matter. I have already chatted with a few nice people and feel better about just being me and not worrying about it all to much.

I thought I would share the story to give you all a giggle in your day. I hope you are all well and as happy as you can be on your road to recovery. I am heading out to walk in the beautiful evening air. Peace love and hugs to you all.

[PHDnon]

I am not overly surprised.

They are masters at mirroring.  He obviously knows what a "catch" such as yourself would be looking for in a man.  He probably mirrored you in the beginning of your relationship.  If you were his last relationship, I can easily see him positioning his POF profile towards those things you valued.  Marketing 101 LOL

He has no sense of self, so he is mirroring what he knows... .YOU.

[nowwhatz]

Thanks you brought a smile to my face reading that

I am doing the same and yeah... .it sucks  but I am a social person so I forge ahead.

When I was trying to keep my exgf during one of our breakups I think I told her I was her best relationship prospect haha.   Unfortunately for me that is probably true unless she can meet a guy who is psychiatrist specializing in BPD who is also a proffesional caregiver.

Hopefully she will have forgotten I said that.

[hope2727]

Glad I could make someone smile.   . It was truly the most surreal experience.

It makes so much more sense now that you remind me of the mirroring. I had forgotten that component. Yes he mirrored me. Then he mirrored his narcissistic friend. Then his druggie brothers. Then his new girlfriend. Now who knows. I meanwhile am still me.