Suggestions for dealing with Anxiety?

[Depression = 72% of members]

I've dealt with pretty intense anxiety since I was a child and was recently officially diagnosed with panic attack disorder, social anxiety and general anxiety disorder when I finally started seeing a therapist for the first time last year. My T thinks these disorders are a direct result of my chaotic/neglectful/abusive upbringing with an uBPD/NPD mother. (My mother knew I had panic attacks when I was younger, but instead of being concerned and talking to me about it, or taking me to see a therapist, she turned it into something to threaten me with. She would become intensely angry, saying that if I didn't "snap out of it" she was going to "make me see someone" in a very ominous way implying that I was going to be locked away because I was crazy.)  Apparently my nervous system and body is constantly on high alert and I'm perpetually going into a freeze state when triggered. In the past year I have made some strides in healing, going NC with my mother, coming to terms with the fact that she is mentally ill, starting to wrap my mind around the fact that I grew up in an abusive environment, and slowly reconnecting with extended family that I haven't been in touch with for years as a result of my mother's controlling and isolating behaviour.

However, I'm feeling pretty depressed because this anxiety is so persistent and it's slowly boxing me in. I have trouble doing so many daily tasks: making phone calls, driving, meeting new people, even walking down the street can be triggering, just to name a few.

Does anyone else struggle with anxiety and have you had any success in lessening the symptoms? And if so how? I feel like I haven't gotten a lot of practical advice about moving past it from my T beyond, keep exposing yourself to the things you are afraid of and taking medication. The thing is, when I force myself to do these things, I'm frequently in a panic state and can't think clearly. I end up doing things and acting in ways that I find embarrassing, which only seems to be reinforcing the need to avoid those things in the first place.

[Lily77]

I've dealt with pretty intense anxiety since I was a child and was recently officially diagnosed with panic attack disorder, social anxiety and general anxiety disorder when I finally started seeing a therapist for the first time last year. My T thinks these disorders are a direct result of my chaotic/neglectful/abusive upbringing with an uBPD/NPD mother. (My mother knew I had panic attacks when I was younger, but instead of being concerned and talking to me about it, or taking me to see a therapist, she turned it into something to threaten me with. She would become intensely angry, saying that if I didn't "snap out of it" she was going to "make me see someone" in a very ominous way implying that I was going to be locked away because I was crazy.)  Apparently my nervous system and body is constantly on high alert and I'm perpetually going into a freeze state when triggered. In the past year I have made some strides in healing, going NC with my mother, coming to terms with the fact that she is mentally ill, starting to wrap my mind around the fact that I grew up in an abusive environment, and slowly reconnecting with extended family that I haven't been in touch with for years as a result of my mother's controlling and isolating behaviour.

However, I'm feeling pretty depressed because this anxiety is so persistent and it's slowly boxing me in. I have trouble doing so many daily tasks: making phone calls, driving, meeting new people, even walking down the street can be triggering, just to name a few.

Does anyone else struggle with anxiety and have you had any success in lessening the symptoms? And if so how? I feel like I haven't gotten a lot of practical advice about moving past it from my T beyond, keep exposing yourself to the things you are afraid of and taking medication. The thing is, when I force myself to do these things, I'm frequently in a panic state and can't think clearly. I end up doing things and acting in ways that I find embarrassing, which only seems to be reinforcing the need to avoid those things in the first place.

[clljhns]

Hi Lily77,

I am so sorry to hear about your anxiety. 


While I don't have many suggestions for you, I am wondering if your T has recommended any exercises to help with the anxiety. I read that your T suggested you expose yourself to the events that are anxiety producing, but has T given you practical exercises on how to process the event while it is happening to reduce the stress?

Can you tell us a little about what events cause you the most anxiety and how you react to them?

I am including a link on the Wise Mind: https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=64749.0  There are some practical ideas on how to link the emotional response to the triggering event. You might also try Cognitive Behavioral Therapy techniques, described here: https://bpdfamily.com/bpdresources/nk_a111.htm

Hope these help! Let us know how you are doing. 

[Pilate]

I have a child with emerging GAD, and I have traits myself. I think CBT and the exposure methods you describe are helpful. In addition to CBT, I have found that taking mindfulness classes and practicing mindfulness techniques is very helpful. I am going to find someone for my daughter as well because I think the exposure and panic you describe is something she is experiencing, too. I have been able to attend mindfulness classes through NAMI and my church (groups hosted by PhD psychologists, which is helpful for me). There are a number of websites that describe mindfulness, and there are some threads on it here on bpdfamily.com.