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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: I haven't posted for a while  (Read 468 times)
SES
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 332


« on: May 18, 2015, 03:31:48 PM »

Well, eight months on and I'm still living with my soon to be  ex uBPD wife, and our kids.  She continued her affair almost all the way through... .in all likelihood she probably still is.  

Our house finally looks like it is selling,  and she hasn't destroyed this sale like she did a previous one.  

She has stopped threatening me.  She hasn't assaulted me recently.   She hasn't made any false allegations recently.

She says she regrets what she did, and at the weekend she said she wanted to reconcile!  

I can't wait for this to be over. It's utter torture.  I can't wait to have my own front door... .to be able to sit and relax in my own home.  To be able to enjoy being with my kids, without worrying if she was coming back.   Fingers crossed the sale goes through.  

I have done quite well in disconnecting from her... .although she still manages to hook me in now and then.  Im not out of the woods yet.  
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Swiggle
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Posts: 232



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« Reply #1 on: May 18, 2015, 03:53:05 PM »

I read a lot and have been wondering how you are doing. Glad to hear about the house sale, sending fast selling vibes your way.
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“The value and quality of any love is determined solely by the lover himself.” ~ Carson McCullers
Panda39
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Relationship status: SO and I have been together 9 years and have just moved in together this summer.
Posts: 3462



« Reply #2 on: May 18, 2015, 04:59:05 PM »

Hi SES

I had been thinking about you too.  Glad to hear you're hanging in there and there is light at the end of the tunnel regarding the sale of your house.

I also read your other post and I'm really glad that some of the suggestions you've been given here have helped protect you from the false aligations.

Good luck with the house sale.

Thinking of you,

Panda39
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"Have you ever looked fear in the face and just said, I just don't care" -Pink
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