Intro

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hi everyone,

I've always had a heartbreakingly difficult relationship with my mother. Over the years, I've read quite extensively about

different personality traits and mental illnesses and now believe she may have BPD. I came across this portal last week and

a lot of the articles really resonated with the experience I'm having.

Our entire extended family is traumatized and battle weary (even those who have cut off all ties to her).

I've tried to keep a healthy distance without cutting off all ties (ie I left the country 15 years ago) and sought help from a

therapist for many years. Although these measures have helped in many respects it hasn't "fixed" the underlying issues.

I'm looking for ways to help her, myself and the rest of our family navigate, heal and move forward.

Not sure where to start. Any ideas?

Would love to find a support group in London, UK.

[PapillonVert]

Hi everyone,

I've always had a heartbreakingly difficult relationship with my mother. Over the years, I've read quite extensively about

different personality traits and mental illnesses and now believe she may have BPD. I came across this portal last week and

a lot of the articles really resonated with the experience I'm having.

Our entire extended family is traumatized and battle weary (even those who have cut off all ties to her).

I've tried to keep a healthy distance without cutting off all ties (ie I left the country 15 years ago) and sought help from a

therapist for many years. Although these measures have helped in many respects it hasn't "fixed" the underlying issues.

I'm looking for ways to help her, myself and the rest of our family navigate, heal and move forward.

Not sure where to start. Any ideas?

Would love to find a support group in London, UK.

[AloneAtLast]

Tell us more about your mother.  I have issues with mine as well.

[Panda39]

Hi PapillonVert, 

You can start right here, I'd like to join AloneAtLast and welcome you to the BPD Family I'm glad you've found us.

I'm a member here because my SO (Significant Other) has an uBPDxw (undiagnosed BPD ex-wife) and they have two daughters D18 and D14 that we have been doing our best to support. So although my mom isn't a pwBPD (person with BPD) I've seen it's effects on my SO' children. 

One key to having a relationship with someone BPD is to protect our own boundaries and it sounds like you created some simply with physical distance.  Here is some additional information on boundaries https://bpdfamily.com/content/values-and-boundaries.

I also want to point out the "Lessons" Links and "Survivors Guide" in the box to the right --->

Can you tell us a little bit more about your mom and what you'd like to work on?

Again Welcome I'm so glad you've joined us.

Panda39