Work visa lost, expecting a storm. Just venting.

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

Two years ago my friend came to live with me in Canada from the US. I had known before she came that she had issues with anxiety/depression but what I found out that first year is how much worse her mental health issues were than I had been led to believe.

She is not diagnosed BPD but her actions line up very well. I sought help for myself (therapy and this board actually) and after some very intense talks managed to get to a place where I felt safe in my own home again.

Unfortunately now that everything has turned around her work visa is expiring and due to the current economy here will not be renewed. Right now she is handling things well but as we get closer and closer to the final day I have no doubt that things are going to get very bad. I don't even want to think what she's going to get like as I start looking for a new room mate... .

I love her very much and I'm sad that this happened as she was really getting it together but at the same time I am relieved that she will not be my problem anymore :/

[catanaition]

Two years ago my friend came to live with me in Canada from the US. I had known before she came that she had issues with anxiety/depression but what I found out that first year is how much worse her mental health issues were than I had been led to believe.

She is not diagnosed BPD but her actions line up very well. I sought help for myself (therapy and this board actually) and after some very intense talks managed to get to a place where I felt safe in my own home again.

Unfortunately now that everything has turned around her work visa is expiring and due to the current economy here will not be renewed. Right now she is handling things well but as we get closer and closer to the final day I have no doubt that things are going to get very bad. I don't even want to think what she's going to get like as I start looking for a new room mate... .

I love her very much and I'm sad that this happened as she was really getting it together but at the same time I am relieved that she will not be my problem anymore :/

[cloudten]

I am sure you are holding your breath for the things to come. I know how that feels... .you know what is coming and have no way to change the course or prevent it. It's like a tsunami I suppose. I was in a similar situation over the weekend.

The number one thing you have to do is protect yourself in every way possible. It sounds like her going home is not the worst thing in the world for you.  

I certainly understand the sense of relief... .and I promise you will be relieved too.

[Mutt]

Right now she is handling things well but as we get closer and closer to the final day I have no doubt that things are going to get very bad.

Hi catanaition,



I understand. I recall feeling so much anxiety and stress; I was convinced with how she would react and sometimes she didn't react with how I anticipated.

I think they call that walking on eggshells.

I would like to echo cloudten, you will feel a sense of relief and not miss that feeling of walking on eggshells.

It gets better. Hang in there.