Mother in law with BPD

[Dinlaw]

We have recently discovered that 20 years of odd behavior by my MIL might be due to BPD.

We are glad to have found a potential explanation, but the wounds and wasted energy this has caused still run deep.  What should our next steps be?

[Suzn]

Hello Dinlaw  

Sorry to hear you've had to deal with odd behavior from your MIL.    BPD is a confusing and sometimes painful disorder. Where did you hear about BPD? What behaviors have you been seeing?

the wounds and wasted energy this has caused still run deep.  What should our next steps be?

We all understand how painful this can be for family.   Taking care of you is one of the first steps. How have you been coping with your MIL? Learning more about BPD behaviors and how to better communicate can help immensely.

Looking forward to hearing more of your story. Keep posting, it helps.

[HappyChappy]

You next steps ... .people find validating their experiences (or childhood) helpful. Odd as my BPD mom’s behaviour was, this website had plenty of others that recognised the same odd behaviour. Also through validating comes understanding of why they did this and better acceptance.

This website also has plenty of resources on how to better deal with a BPD, using techniques. Also there are books and Therapists to consider. Probably best to just say what’s on your mind, what issues you want to address, even if that’s just recognition that having a BPD MIL is tough.

I have yet to see a judgmental comment on this website (maybe I'm not looking close enough) but it's a safe enviroment to discuss things, and there's a real deap of knowlage, especialy in the moderators,  just don't use your real name. Welcome.