Hi livednlearned
well
each episode (maybe not on this board?) seems so silly & insignificant when told separately, but, what happened on vacay (7 hours away) was that i got the feeling as always of being treated like a child, (hesitation to hand me our debit card, told me he would do something that i was easily about to do myself--we went 2 snow & didnt own a sled-stopped by a local sports store and agreed if its under a certain amt $$ we'd buy one and if not, no big deal we'd pass & just play in snow-- i went to go in store he said, yea, go look & then if so ,come back to car, ill go in & buy it... .well that doesnt make sense just hand me the card, and if its a reasonable price, ill buy it, no need to come report back to you and make a switch and have u go in the store! LOL? ) adn i stood up for myself & reminded him not to do /treat me these ways no glaring etc --
well sled was $ too much for 2 days in the snow with our paycheck 2 paycheck lifestyle currently
so i came back to car, mind you gone for 2 seconds, guess he had thought about how i stood up to him,,he was MOODY, angry, child crying in backseat which GREATLY AFFECTS him, & didnt want to play in snow AT ALL . tellig me get in the car, i didnt like it, i told him to calm down... .he told me if i didnt get in he would leave me there... .(what? 7 hours away from home in the snow in a strange store parking lot?) i said, lets agree.you calm down, drive us all safely to hotel. then u can go in and ill take kids to snow. he agreed but as soon as i got in started telling me how i will PAY for how i treated him. he will show me (revenge) he swears on his fathers life that i will pay for being like this in public, etc etc etc... .i told him stop threating me , lets not talk, take us to hotel. when we got there, he would NOT let me take the (our) car to take kids to snow! said i wasnt in a right state of mind,not competent to drive to snow, etc... .etc. well i told him he cannot control my actions, i amnot wearing a burka? this is enough info, u can already tell how horrible it was. so we all went inside. put baby to nap, and when he was calm, (he ALWAYS CALMS DOWN and returns to 'normal.) i tlaked to him. he listned well. i once again explained that this is not normal reactions, the amount of anger is not proportionate to the event, this was the first event since end of octobers restrainign order, and he had done great, but NOT ENOUGH. and i would not be with him if he didnt agree to see a DR.
so thats where i am now.
action, to get him to see someone.
Hi Jwifeandmom,
What happened during the vacation episode?
How did he respond when you told him he needed to see a doctor?
Glad you found the site. We understand, and you're not alone.
LnL
