I know that is what she wants, but it is so hard not to fall for it. She said some things several months ago that really hurt bad, it crushed me inside. So she knows this is the perfect trigger. And so far I have done a spiral straight into a depressed feeling. I wish I could put my feelings in a jar and hide them somewhere she can't find them. And then there is the other 75% of the time when I am so in love it feels fantastic.
Somethings you will learn to shrug off much the same as when a toddler announces to a parent that they hate them and they want to run away. Other issues it will cut too deep. Dont bury these or they will compound and you will struggle to control the inevitable reaction when it comes.
This is where you need to learn to express your dissatisfaction and then use boundary actions if need be to avoid escalation. Most of these triggers are repetitive (often the reason they cut so deep) so you can prepare responses in advance rather than trying to rely on your reactions in the moment, which can easily run away from you.
Having this balance of acceptance and self protecting boundaries will help to clarify in your mind what is important and what isn't. Otherwise they all combine and everything feels worse than it is. All meshing together untill it feels hopeless.
