Chilling message from a mutual friend

[burritoman]

I met with a mutual friend of my expwBPD the other day. It was the first time I'd seen anybody from her camp since breaking up. We talked at great length about my ex and her problems, and the most liberating thing about the meeting is that she suspected and has witnessed all of her insane behavior before and since breaking up. She said many things that I'd been speculating about over the last 3 months, and it feels amazing to have these things confirmed from inside her camp rather than me sitting here speculating.

Today she sent me a rather ominous and chilling text that I've tattooed on my brain -

"She will come back one day. But you better stay far away."

Take this to heart, and if you're still thinking of how to get him or her back and how much they'll change or things will be different, just stop. Stop right now.

[Confused108]

Sounds to me like your exs friend is giving you a definite Warning! Your ex at some point will and is coming back. When? Time will tell. I have heard of some ex BPDs making the rounds and coming back and some never do. My ex wanted to remain friends but after what she pulled on me I said hell no way! I will not be one of her horses in her stable. That's over. If I were you Burito man stay away! Good luck and keep your eyes peeled!

[Herodias]

It is gratifying to hear the crazy stuff continues. Only in that all of the times we were told it was us, we can finally see it was not-not at all! Mine is trying to be all nice to me now too. I know it's just for his own selfish reasons. I know he tried to manipulate another woman recently too. I am glad to see that this newer and younger model (the current gf) is not keeping him satisfied either... .your friends comment to stay far away is a good warning. After I got the email from him today asking me "how have you been"... .I got into my buildings elevator and smelled beer and cigarettes! It was a reminder of what I left... .Glad I don't have to smell that anymore,   That was my own warning!

[NYCIntrospect]

I met with a mutual friend of my expwBPD the other day. It was the first time I'd seen anybody from her camp since breaking up. We talked at great length about my ex and her problems, and the most liberating thing about the meeting is that she suspected and has witnessed all of her insane behavior before and since breaking up. She said many things that I'd been speculating about over the last 3 months, and it feels amazing to have these things confirmed from inside her camp rather than me sitting here speculating.

Today she sent me a rather ominous and chilling text that I've tattooed on my brain -

"She will come back one day. But you better stay far away."

Take this to heart, and if you're still thinking of how to get him or her back and how much they'll change or things will be different, just stop. Stop right now.

how did this meeting come about?  did they initiate or did you? 

[burritoman]

I met with a mutual friend of my expwBPD the other day. It was the first time I'd seen anybody from her camp since breaking up. We talked at great length about my ex and her problems, and the most liberating thing about the meeting is that she suspected and has witnessed all of her insane behavior before and since breaking up. She said many things that I'd been speculating about over the last 3 months, and it feels amazing to have these things confirmed from inside her camp rather than me sitting here speculating.

Today she sent me a rather ominous and chilling text that I've tattooed on my brain -

"She will come back one day. But you better stay far away."

Take this to heart, and if you're still thinking of how to get him or her back and how much they'll change or things will be different, just stop. Stop right now.

how did this meeting come about?  did they initiate or did you?  

She was in town for work reasons (her and my ex live about two hours away), and she reached out to me. We hadn't even spoken for about a month before my ex and I broke up, so about 4 months earlier. I was very surprised to hear from her, especially because I assumed I want painted black to that entire camp. Turns out I wasn't. I guess she never even brings me up.

[SummerStorm]

I met with a mutual friend of my expwBPD the other day. It was the first time I'd seen anybody from her camp since breaking up. We talked at great length about my ex and her problems, and the most liberating thing about the meeting is that she suspected and has witnessed all of her insane behavior before and since breaking up. She said many things that I'd been speculating about over the last 3 months, and it feels amazing to have these things confirmed from inside her camp rather than me sitting here speculating.

Today she sent me a rather ominous and chilling text that I've tattooed on my brain -

"She will come back one day. But you better stay far away."

Take this to heart, and if you're still thinking of how to get him or her back and how much they'll change or things will be different, just stop. Stop right now.

how did this meeting come about?  did they initiate or did you?  

She was in town for work reasons (her and my ex live about two hours away), and she reached out to me. We hadn't even spoken for about a month before my ex and I broke up, so about 4 months earlier. I was very surprised to hear from her, especially because I assumed I want painted black to that entire camp. Turns out I wasn't. I guess she never even brings me up.

This seems pretty typical of pwBPD who come back.  Even they know it doesn't make sense to trash a person one second and then tell everyone how amazing the person is the next second.  The only people my BPD friend trashed her ex-boyfriend to were her mom and stepdad, to gain sympathy from them and to put the blame on him for why they didn't move out to live with them like they had planned.  She hasn't said anything bad about him to me.  She didn't say anything bad about him on Facebook.  A few weeks ago, after having him blocked for months, she sent him a friend request.  That day was actually funny.  Out of the clear blue, I got a text from him that said, "You were right.  She just sent me a friend request." 

And it seems like the only person she trashed me to was her ex-boyfriend, after she ended our friendship the first time.  She once told me that she told people I'm crazy, but I'm starting to doubt that. 

But what do I know, ?  I'm currently her friend and am painted white, but I'm still blocked on Facebook.  We're friends on Snapchat, though.  Go figure.  She trusts me enough to not worry that I'll take screenshots of her Snaps and send them to people, but she doesn't trust me enough to have me comment on her posts.  Just another example of her ridiculous thought process. 

[Rmbrworst]

@Summerstorm

My exBPD unfriended me on Facebook and when we got back together would not accept my friend request.   However, after being on and off (unfriending each other and re-friending again), he always let me back onto Instagram and Twitter.

Like . . . umm okay whatever I dunno?  It never made sense to me either.

What really doesn't make sense to me, is the fact that I accepted that he wouldn't friend me on Facebook.

Umm, no, we're in a relationship.  We need to be friends on social media (if you use it).  Red flags . . ignored.  I'm keeping notes of all the missed red flags, and I think I'm at a list of about 20 now

@buritoman

"She will come back one day. But you better stay far away."

I would like if someone told me this from his camp right now. It would make me feel so much better.  Be glad you have PROOF you made the right choice!

[SummerStorm]

@Summerstorm

My exBPD unfriended me on Facebook and when we got back together would not accept my friend request.   However, after being on and off (unfriending each other and re-friending again), he always let me back onto Instagram and Twitter.

Like . . . umm okay whatever I dunno?  It never made sense to me either.

What really doesn't make sense to me, is the fact that I accepted that he wouldn't friend me on Facebook.

Umm, no, we're in a relationship.  We need to be friends on social media (if you use it).  Red flags . . ignored.  I'm keeping notes of all the missed red flags, and I think I'm at a list of about 20 now

A few days after she friended me on Facebook back in November, I sent her an Instagram follow request and was denied.  She unfollowed me on Twitter last June and then made her account private. 

I find Snapchat to be annoying in general, and her Snapchats are super annoying.   

I think the Facebook thing is that she doesn't want me to know anything about her relationships.  Actually, it's probably better that way.  She and I have a complicated relationship, and for a few months last year, I really thought that we would end up together.  I'm really glad we didn't, obviously, but it does still hurt a bit when I see her with someone new.  There's a narcissistic part of me that still wonders why she never wanted to actually be in a relationship with me.  She's dated probably 20+ people, but I wasn't one of them.  I guess a part of me does hope that it's because she knew it wouldn't end well and that she didn't want to hurt me.

Today, I saw she had posted a picture to her Snapchat story.  It was her and her new guy.  He has bright blue hair. 

But to get back to the original post, this just shows that they always come back, in some way or another.  If she actually enters into a relationship with this new guy and then breaks up with him, she will attach herself to me again.   

[Rmbrworst]

@Summerstorm

My exBPD unfriended me on Facebook and when we got back together would not accept my friend request.   However, after being on and off (unfriending each other and re-friending again), he always let me back onto Instagram and Twitter.

Like . . . umm okay whatever I dunno?  It never made sense to me either.

What really doesn't make sense to me, is the fact that I accepted that he wouldn't friend me on Facebook.

Umm, no, we're in a relationship.  We need to be friends on social media (if you use it).  Red flags . . ignored.  I'm keeping notes of all the missed red flags, and I think I'm at a list of about 20 now

A few days after she friended me on Facebook back in November, I sent her an Instagram follow request and was denied.  She unfollowed me on Twitter last June and then made her account private. 

I find Snapchat to be annoying in general, and her Snapchats are super annoying.   

I think the Facebook thing is that she doesn't want me to know anything about her relationships.  Actually, it's probably better that way.  She and I have a complicated relationship, and for a few months last year, I really thought that we would end up together.  I'm really glad we didn't, obviously, but it does still hurt a bit when I see her with someone new.  There's a narcissistic part of me that still wonders why she never wanted to actually be in a relationship with me.  She's dated probably 20+ people, but I wasn't one of them.  I guess a part of me does hope that it's because she knew it wouldn't end well and that she didn't want to hurt me.

Today, I saw she had posted a picture to her Snapchat story.  It was her and her new guy.  He has bright blue hair. 

But to get back to the original post, this just shows that they always come back, in some way or another.  If she actually enters into a relationship with this new guy and then breaks up with him, she will attach herself to me again.   

I often find myself thinking this as well.

My exBPD told me many times "I dont know why I keep hurting you, I dont deserve you."

Well he doesn't deserve me, that's true.  I dont even know why I waste time thinking about him.  I thought he was somebody different than he was.  I wish I could find someone like my exBPD, but someone that doesn't lie, cheat, manipulate, and discard. 

He's back with his "ex" boyfriend.  Seeing them together doesn't bother me.  I know they are extremely unhappy (they have both told me how miserable they are in the relationship).

It's all a total mindf*ck.  I know where you are coming from and how you feel.