Lots of stuff in a matter of weeks

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hi there. A few weeks ago i met a guy through our mutual friend. It was a night like any other and i get a facebook request and acceted it. little did i know we would develope a liking for eachother and eventually go o a date.

the date seemed so magical. We went out for ice cream and walked around the mall. he held my hand and would kiss m cheek. Always saying how pretty i was. That night was made out of so many perfect momnets : from throwing pennies in the wishing well- to elderly people looking at us like we were freaks (he and i dress "emo"/ goth or whatever)

the next day was valentines day so of course we also spent that together. cudding and haveing cute conversations. We really felt comfortable with eachother, however a bit of doubt was placed in my mind. prior to actually meeting he told me he wanted a serious relationship- and i did too. he also caimed how he used to not be so decent in the past- hhaveing 16 different sexual partners and things such as that. he also told me he feared love.

that next week was hell. it started off with two guys starting drama after i posted a cute photo of him and i on facebook. these guys were telling him how im a slut and this and that and actually went so far as to change their friends name in their phone and say things like "wonna bang" and many other things. i however am a proud virgin (something he respected) but this is where the drama starts. we ended up fighting the entire day and eventually i showed up at his house ad he apologized. the nextday i was at work and my couin was oon ny facebook and he freaked out because i was online when i was at work,he was upset and to leave him alone so i did so and it made it worse. . Eventually each day we fought. never in person but in txt messages we would fight. sad it really hurt. friday night/ saturday morning he broke up with me. and then (i forgot to say hes in a band- he an i are very different im 18 and a sophmore in college- hes 20 and doesnt even have a GED and is a lead singer in a band- as you can assume my parents didnt like him which caused tention too) he was saying things like "idont want you, i dont want to ever see you again, leave me the f*** alone" and eventually spread rumors that im "stalking him", he threatened me with a restraining order, all these things. and during all that he found a new girl- who was at his show that i also attended that saturday because my freinds already agreed ed to go to it. when at the show he still had on my lucky hello-kitty braclet. he wouldnt stop staring at me even though i was in the most odd spot like kinda the the right in the mid of the room. even when i left the stage room and was sitting on a sofa chatting to a guy friend i had just met there. (i think he thinks i brought that guy)

i guess i just dont understand. he doesnt for sure have BPD, however he seems to meet all the criteria. From th roots it makessence. his father left him in his early teens... .girlfreinds have left him... many bad things just have happened... .is that why he left, so i didnt leave first? Why did he replce me so soon? Is he going to be okay? i worry about him, he would often say things about killing himself and had self harm wounds. i guess i dont understand how he picked up and moved on so suddenly- or what i did to make him leave. will he come back? what do i do when he comes back? I mean iwont lie i ocassionally look at his facebook page and see he and this girl who replaced me will delete and re-add one another... .anotother post said"i culd have had something nice and good for me but i now destroyed it"... .he made me happy and i wanted to make him happy. he was such a sweetheart in person... .im really just looking for any help i can get please.

[dizzy_dreamer]

Hi there. A few weeks ago i met a guy through our mutual friend. It was a night like any other and i get a facebook request and acceted it. little did i know we would develope a liking for eachother and eventually go o a date.

the date seemed so magical. We went out for ice cream and walked around the mall. he held my hand and would kiss m cheek. Always saying how pretty i was. That night was made out of so many perfect momnets : from throwing pennies in the wishing well- to elderly people looking at us like we were freaks (he and i dress "emo"/ goth or whatever)

the next day was valentines day so of course we also spent that together. cudding and haveing cute conversations. We really felt comfortable with eachother, however a bit of doubt was placed in my mind. prior to actually meeting he told me he wanted a serious relationship- and i did too. he also caimed how he used to not be so decent in the past- hhaveing 16 different sexual partners and things such as that. he also told me he feared love.

that next week was hell. it started off with two guys starting drama after i posted a cute photo of him and i on facebook. these guys were telling him how im a slut and this and that and actually went so far as to change their friends name in their phone and say things like "wonna bang" and many other things. i however am a proud virgin (something he respected) but this is where the drama starts. we ended up fighting the entire day and eventually i showed up at his house ad he apologized. the nextday i was at work and my couin was oon ny facebook and he freaked out because i was online when i was at work,he was upset and to leave him alone so i did so and it made it worse. . Eventually each day we fought. never in person but in txt messages we would fight. sad it really hurt. friday night/ saturday morning he broke up with me. and then (i forgot to say hes in a band- he an i are very different im 18 and a sophmore in college- hes 20 and doesnt even have a GED and is a lead singer in a band- as you can assume my parents didnt like him which caused tention too) he was saying things like "idont want you, i dont want to ever see you again, leave me the f*** alone" and eventually spread rumors that im "stalking him", he threatened me with a restraining order, all these things. and during all that he found a new girl- who was at his show that i also attended that saturday because my freinds already agreed ed to go to it. when at the show he still had on my lucky hello-kitty braclet. he wouldnt stop staring at me even though i was in the most odd spot like kinda the the right in the mid of the room. even when i left the stage room and was sitting on a sofa chatting to a guy friend i had just met there. (i think he thinks i brought that guy)

i guess i just dont understand. he doesnt for sure have BPD, however he seems to meet all the criteria. From th roots it makessence. his father left him in his early teens... .girlfreinds have left him... many bad things just have happened... .is that why he left, so i didnt leave first? Why did he replce me so soon? Is he going to be okay? i worry about him, he would often say things about killing himself and had self harm wounds. i guess i dont understand how he picked up and moved on so suddenly- or what i did to make him leave. will he come back? what do i do when he comes back? I mean iwont lie i ocassionally look at his facebook page and see he and this girl who replaced me will delete and re-add one another... .anotother post said"i culd have had something nice and good for me but i now destroyed it"... .he made me happy and i wanted to make him happy. he was such a sweetheart in person... .im really just looking for any help i can get please.

[once removed]

hi dizzy_dreamer and

im glad you found us. that is an awful lot of stuff in a matter of weeks. these relationships tend to be volatile, with extreme highs and lows, and to have it end so suddenly must leave you with a lot of confusion and pain  .

i am sure many members here can relate to your story. my relationship ended very suddenly as well, with my former partner jumping into a new relationship. it all seemed pretty unreal. unknown to us at the time, our partners were experiencing a lot of inner turmoil and a conflicted sense of the relationship, experiencing things very differently than we were at the time, which may seem completely at odds with the words being spoken to us.

its hard to say whether he will come back. are you hoping to restore the relationship?