More anger games...

[Herodias]

So, this is the first time he is not paying my alimony on the first of the month... .and still no payment.  He is angry because I closed the joint account. I told him we can not have a joint account and be divorced (I do not want to be responsible if he does something irresponsible with it and that is very possible). There are plenty of other ways to pay. He knows that, and did it last month. I don't know why it is suddenly a big issue. He even wrote to my lawyer drunk one night with a screwed up e-mail that she forwarded to me with her response that we do not have to have a joint account and he is to pay me through any account I wish. I think he is mad. He has ten days to pay me unfortunately ... .I wished I set it up for him to pay me within 5 days. He gets paid on the first and I am worried he will float money around or spend it all some way and not have it for me. It's messed up. For those of you who don't believe in alimony, I can assure you it is very well deserved and owed to me for all of the thousands I spent on him! I do not feel bad in the least over it. In fact, he is the one that offered it to me! Maybe as a way to always be in touch, I am not sure. So anyway, I know he doesn't want to deal with a court battle so he will eventually pay... .I hope!  Anyone had an experience with them having to pay money or child support payments? It's frustrating relying on irresponsible people... .I guess this is the only way he has left to "control" me... .I am not saying a word! I only will if he is late.

[WoundedBibi]

He is angry because I closed the joint account. I told him we can not have a joint account and be divorced (I do not want to be responsible if he does something irresponsible with it and that is very possible).

Very sensible.

I don't know why it is suddenly a big issue.

It isn't. He is making it into an issue.

He even wrote to my lawyer drunk one night with a screwed up e-mail

More drama.

Anyone had an experience with them having to pay money or child support payments?

Fortunately, no. I am really grateful my dreams of buying a house to do up in his home country, getting married and having babies never happened.

I guess this is the only way he has left to "control" me... .I am not saying a word! I only will if he is late.

He probably wants to exercise control over you. And probably wants to punish you for leaving. And he's inviting you to join him in his drama dance; begging for an emotional reaction, drama, to which he can react, more drama, more emotion from you, more drama, more emotion from him, etc etc

Don't react. Leave the communication to your lawyer. And factor in this will not be the last time the payment will be late. Set aside some money if you can from this payment when if comes, or future payments, to tie you over if the payment is ever late and you desperately need to pay something.

[Herodias]

Thanks... .I kind of feel like he is punishing me for not leaving. He wanted to get divorced this month in order to stop paying my health insurance and possibly because he wants to remarry before this baby comes... .or at least not have the baby while married to someone other than the mother. Not too sure. He paid the lawyer later than she discussed with him, so we will not get divorced until June now and if he doesn't pay, it could be longer. He is mad. I say... .consequences. You would think he would think before marrying again. In November he told me he didn't want to marry the gf  because he didn't want to end up paying her child support and alimony- due to the future women! He was drunk when he said it- true or not true... .who knows.