I want to expose him

[cm3557]

I was just going to write a detailed story explaining the hideous history between my exBPD/NPD  and i - how i wanted to expose him/find some sort of justice... .

as i was typing i thought - this doesn't deserve my time and deleted the two sentences id started.

im not stewing over the pain anymore.  im not asking the same unanswered questions.

not worth the energy or the emotion.

period. done.

i feel like this is a HUGE moment for me.  so it gets better after all.

[once removed]

i think sometimes, something just clicks in us, very similar to the feelings you are describing. we just become exhausted with it all.

just know that you are in a safe place to tell your story, and that youre not alone in your feelings of wanting to expose, or find some sort of justice. it was kind of my final hump (i didnt experience much anger till really late on) and i was fixated on it for a while. it would not be productive to act on in real life, but its very productive to acknowledge and work through.

yes. it does get better

[cherryblossom]

Well done 

[balletomane]

Well done. Sometimes I really want to contact my replacement and tell her everything she doesn't know about me and what he did to me, for the sake of being acknowledged by someone who contributed to the situation. The way my ex treated me left me feeling completely invisible, like discarded trash, and exposing his behaviour to her feels like a way to assert my worth as a person and receive justice. But I know that I can't always rely on others for affirmation of my pain, that there is no guarantee she would react in a compassionate way, and that she probably has enough problems with him without me bequeathing her the legacy of mine. So instead I'm focusing on my new career and basically trying to write my own story instead of hoping other people will come and ink in the missing parts. It sounds as if you're doing something similar. Good luck with it, and here's to a happier future for us all!