Thank u - its horrible isn't it that total annhilation and destruction of self and those closest is preferable to seeking therapy and repairing once valued bonds. Im a strong believer that once someone awakens to the knowledge of the psyche through psychotherapy they have the power to change---including a BPD person - but they got to want it and stick to it---- im learning so much about the power of the unconcious on the material world and relationships - I believe I have some disorganised attachmwnt issues which is why we were so highly attracted. He almost took me down, (i.e I almost took myself down by turning against my values and self preservation) I almost went through with a suicide in the aftermath and almost lost everything including my mind... .but im a strong mf and will rise and rise
some little internal spirit inside never allows me to totally annihilate myself----whilst he falls and falls- or stagnates and stagnates ---i dont want to gloat id much prefer he got his head out his arse - but cest la vie! I'm so much more focused on ME its unreal! And it feels excellent! ! .
