Exgf is giving TMI

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

Dropped my son off this morning, she comes out in sweat pants hanging down exposing her under "things" and just has to inform me she didn't sleep well last night because she was all alone and it was too quiet... .Yeah, good luck with that. Lol

She's so strange, is that what I liked about her?

Oh who cares,

I'm sleeping like a baby and I'm not giving that away again.

[JerryRG]

Dropped my son off this morning, she comes out in sweat pants hanging down exposing her under "things" and just has to inform me she didn't sleep well last night because she was all alone and it was too quiet... .Yeah, good luck with that. Lol

She's so strange, is that what I liked about her?

Oh who cares,

I'm sleeping like a baby and I'm not giving that away again.

[JerryRG]

Manipulation, drama and chaos... .

[Mutt]

I can relate with that. My exBPDw will complain about her finances and how many people that they have to take care of in her family. She made her choices and she wants sympathy. This will pass. I'm laser focused with keeping the dialogue on the kids and not on personal stuff. I nod, smile get the kids and leave. I keep it business like, switch on / switch off days. I don't respond to anything that wavers from that. Hang in there.

[JerryRG]

Me too Mutt, the one thing I have found that works for me is keeping my emotions out of our conversations. The robot thing. She's constantly searching for attention and flirting. I find her entertaining now that I'm detached. She's so predictible, I can breath again.

[Mutt]

I would feel insulted too. It can be hard at times to be emotionally detached early in our recovery. Keep ignoring her advances, think about what's best for your son.

[JerryRG]

Exactly Mutt! He comes first from now on. Poor guy didn't have much of a dad while I was breaking free from the BPD relationship but now that I'm out I have energy and clarity and I'm never going back on that rollar coaster again.

[drummerboy5]

Jerry, kind of funny that the same woman that is now flirting with you is the same woman that accused you of rape? I'd stay the heck away from that as she could be setting you up for another rape accusation...

[JerryRG]

Indeed drummerboy5

She is very disordered and I'm careful to never be alone with her. She sure loves perading her bf in front of me. Or he's so jealous he can't trust her? What a team of strange and bizarre they make.

[drummerboy5]

Indeed drummerboy5

She is very disordered and I'm careful to never be alone with her. She sure loves perading her bf in front of me. Or he's so jealous he can't trust her? What a team of strange and bizarre they make.

Good jerry! My T has warned me that if my ex starts to come around after my child is born this month to be very cautious as she could be setting me up. I'm staying the hell away unless it's to pick my daughter up and take her for awhile. I will not be going to moms and seeing my child in her mothers company

[JerryRG]

Yeah I hear you, I tried to see my son for the first 6 months before I was granted legal rights. His mother treated me like a fungus and made it impossible to be around her. Everything I did was wrong, one day I came in and my son was ill, I had a bottle of antiseptic hand wash with me and used it so not to make him worse. She looks at our son and says "J your dad is a f dumba**"

Yeah she's a sweetheart  

Correction!  She said I was FN insane!

[drummerboy5]

Yeah I hear you, I tried to see my son for the first 6 months before I was granted legal rights. His mother treated me like a fungus and made it impossible to be around her. Everything I did was wrong, one day I came in and my son was ill, I had a bottle of antiseptic hand wash with me and used it so not to make him worse. She looks at our son and says "J your dad is a f dumba**"

Yeah she's a sweetheart 

Doesn't surprise me! I'm sure I'll get the same great treatment as you. Mines been on fb posting about toxic people controlling. I can't help to laugh as she was the controlling person she's a delusional mess and is always the victim. The sad thing is no one sticks up to her and they let her get away with it. Well I'm not the type that will just sit back and take her abuse anymore and I will calm her out on her bs because I'm not afraid of her anymore!

[JerryRG]

I've been told to maintain peace at all cost for the child's sake. I have detached enough to not get emotionally hooked into my exgfs crazy behaviours. I'm a robot around her, deliberately turn my emotions off before being around her. It WORKS! Lol

We as nons have to stay in control because they cannot. Just focus on your child and yourself and ignore your ex as much as possible.

It does get easier with practice