It's been years ... I'm back

[SoMuchPain]

Hey SoMuchPain, that sounds like a pretty whimsical description of what you're looking for in a partner.

What do you think the *actual* qualities of a person that could make you feel that way are?

Ya know, if I have to be honest, it's really hard to tell.  Some people just do it for me, if that makes any sense.  I guess a snarky, yet lovable personality would be a big one.  (Like exBPD had the snarky and loveable down ... .just couldn't ever mix the two ).

I like people that keep me on my toes.

Yes, my description is whimsical, but I suppose it's the same idea as when someone asks me what my type is.  I just say, "I can't describe it.  I know it when I see it."

But, alas, I'll try:

Witty

Firey

Flirty

Spontaneous yet stable-minded

Unpredictable yet dependable

Logical yet emotional

Intelligent

Driven

[joeramabeme]

Well, I'm looking for someone who makes me feel alive.  Someone who just makes my cells dance, so to speak, and makes me feel weak in the knees with giddiness when I look at them.  Someone to get to snuggle everyday (affection is important to me).  Someone who can plan for the future with me.  Someone to possibly have a child with. 

Can you maybe see why it's hard for me to get this same feeling of what I'm looking for out of a platonic friendship? 

Yes, platonic friendship question.  Yet your reply is so broad that there are literally tens if not hundreds of thousands that could meet those criteria.  I don't see any "shouldn't have's" in there.  And how about some critical factors such as respect, stability, sense of self worth, compassion for others, ability to be patient, good listener, knows how to take care of herself, is emotionally healthy etc.  This list could be very long! 

These same qualities I listed above apply to good friendships.  Which is why I say there may be an ability to cross over what you get from friendships to romantic relationships.

Hope that resonates.