Apprently she thinks we are evolving and we will never truely be "over"! The more she speaks the nuttier she sounds.
Ladies and Gentlemen, im am out of this and running to the hills hahaha...
How mental can a persobn be to treat someone with such hate and distain that they think you'll be there and happy to work at things? Yes i love her but im starting to realise i love myself a bit more than i do her.
She there tapping up fresh supply yet still expects me to be there at her beck and call. Nope not this time.
Bloody nutjob
DazedD40
I'll take blame for my stupidity for continuously taking her back in my life, when I had plenty of opportunities to make the right decision and cut her out of my life. I continuously gave her the opportunity to toy with me. I knew I was painted black. I confronted her too often, accused her of cheating (never had any physical proof) but yet like an idiot I went back for more. I did this despite knowing all the dangers of being involved with a mentally ill person. I did it despite my friends and family telling me to stay the ''F'' away from her. She knew this. She knew she had me, when I accused her of so many faults, but yet she could always get me back, I was thrown into the heap of useful objects conditioned to be at her beck in call when no others are around.
It just boggles my mind that she's willing to repeatedly sleep with me despite painting me black. I guess she will use any tool available to keep me hooked. Granted, I'm not any better as I thought I could sleep with her, no strings attached. I couldn't, and I now realize that I do need some specialized help. The feelings are still there. Every successive recycle was just a 24 hour window to rekindle the the idealization stage, after that there is hell to pay.
Here is the order of events;
1. She broke up with me in late April, when she probably found a replacement.
2. I was doing well in my recovery, I was realizing how this could never work. We would go weeks without speaking, and as I was beginning to feel better, I allowed her to reel me back in.
3. I was painted black. Too many accusations that hit too close to reality for her. She can't have this. I was just a mouse to play with. See if she could snare me, despite me knowing that she is toxic for me. This is narcissism at it's finest. Her dialogue must have been something along the lines of, I could still get him back despite all his accusations.
4. I know a lot about t BPD. I've done months of research. Heck I thought I was an expert. At the end of the day, I was just a guy, who refused to go no contact.
5. She resented me, and used are time together, just to work on painting me as being unworthy of her. I was defective, and this last discard gave her the opportunity to allow her to list more reasons why she look for someone else. It's a mind ''F'' preparing me for an even deeper fall into the gutter.
6. It's the cat and mouse game. She's going in for the kill. She has a new replacement all lined up. What greater opportunity to have her cake and eat it too.
As far as sex is concerned, to her I'm a vibrator who keeps on giving even when the battery is low. She would use me to kill time until my replacement is available.