Hi and welcome DusktoDawn, sorry to hear about the ups and downs you've been dealing with in your relationship, we understand. That's a common theme you will find here. To the right of this page you will note tools and lessons that you will find of great help along the way.
Something else I felt helpful was looking through others stories and the subsequent responses on the threads. It let me know I was not alone in my struggles and it gave me a lot of insight by seeing others respond with suggestions and their own experiences.
I see you're thinking of getting some help... .many here have found therapists to be of great help in navigating issues that come with BPD. I will however suggest NOT to bring up BPD with your partner. Firstly, we are not trained to give a diagnosis, secondly giving a label to the problems will feel like blame to your partner... .and nobody likes to be blamed... .even if it's true... .especially BPD's. I would suggest finding a therapist who works with personality disorders and going to that person as a couple. Allow that therapist to professionally guide you both. This suggestion comes from my own personal experience... .and learning from my mistakes.
Another thing I learned is that we cannot change them (that's up to them), but we can change how we react and communicate with them and doing that with the tools and lessons provided here can have a very positive impact!
You've found a place full of people who understand, as we have walked a mile in the same shoes. Feel free to share anytime, I found sharing to be very therapeutic... .and the more I shared the more I got in return. We look forward to hearing more.
