It seems realistic

... .but it makes me struggle. It makes me feel like I still can't leave her because ultimately she doesn't want me to leave even tho she's pushing me away.  

I know she's silently screaming that she wants me to stay.  

And it tears me apart because I can't do anything.

... and she doesn't want me to. 

how about a grown woman yelling, berating, belittling, slapping, kicking, spitting on, and cursing at a man that sits there with his head down and his hands folded on his lap

and it should be a 2 hour video

This a sweet and sad video. Heartbreaking. But it implies that pwBPD have self-awareness. Maybe the ones portrayed here do. If they were capable of that much honesty, maybe that's what they would say. But don't.

Mine lives in denial - he may know he is in pain, but he's not vulnerable like these people are. He mostly blames others for it.

Also implies that they want us to save them. Maybe that part is true. But we can't. The video is depicted as - if we cared, we would, and we should - and toss out all our boundaries because they are suffering (the man running back in to rescue her from self-harming). The message is one of compassion but misses our need for self-preservation, and their need to learn to self-soothe in healthier ways. The man probably left in the first place because she was saying crazy, mean, hateful things. The fallacy is that if we show we care, the abuse will stop (the girl at the end falling gently into his arms as he takes the knife from her hand). Doesn't work this way. In a heightened emotional state, that girl would've slashed his throat! Good insight into their minds, their true thoughts, when they're calm, hurting, and being completely honest with themselves, but that doesn't quite match up with our realities.

Although the message is clear to me, the voice is not inspiring, tending to a sad victim, which is strengthened by the piano play that adds the illusion of sadness. Sadness and pain as in the Song of Natalie Merchant, ‘my skin’.

Once I found this one, not a  ‘sappy dark "suidical theme" video’  
It’s from a young man diagnosed with BPD. His video ‘the 5 faces of BPD’ shows a 746.000 hits, a video in which he switch places in a dialogue with himself.  
Although it is not telling how pwBPD feels inside, it gives a view of how pwBPD can react on in a for us innocent and non confrontational dialogue.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Do6owMR1hSY

https://www.youtube.com/user/MeAndMyBlackTable/about

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Separate thread on this video: https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=128784

My wife's inner life may be more like, "everything is perfect, just like everyone else, just perfect, my husband is a genius and so respectable, the ungrateful POS, he makes my life unbearable, our relationship is great, we will always be together, I am going to leave and steal our son even though I do not want to take care of him but I what to hurt my ingrate husband, everything is perfect. I feel fine." The only unspoken thought here, just below consciousness I believe, is "Hurting people makes me feel better."
Maybe the good doctor has studied BPD and know better, or maybe the doctor has never lived with a person with BPD, or maybe my understanding is just way off.

The visuals are over dramatised.

The narrator's use of the third person distanced me from the voiceover content - first person would be more immediate.

The music track is schmaltzy and the voice of the actress is too professional.

The message was not delivered for me.

This video doesn't show how much a partner of a borderline suffers. A relationship with a BPD can actually kill you.

Hmm I want to try to be fair but like others have said I don't think this is realistic at all. I don't think it properly shows what it is like for the partner or the borderline. The dancing girl isn't necessary. I think it would be better if the man tried to kiss the woman on the forehead in bed and she turned away. Also it would have been more accurate if she got angry and started violently swinging at him when he tried to help her off the ground. Showing him leaving the house shows him easily giving up. Maybe if she ran into the bathroom and locked herself in and was crying on the floor and found some razor blades in the cupboard.

I'm not trying to be funny but I think the next thing could show their deep fear of abandonment. Maybe show a girl smiling then texting someone "I love you" then watching her phone as 1 minute passes, then 2, then 3 and then show her panicking and throwing her phone and breaking down crying. Then maybe cut back to the phone on the floor showing her guy texted her "I love you so much" then cut back to her cutting herself.

Not all self injure via cutting
Seems more like a "stereotypical" statement/expression that represents all forms of self injury.
Would be more accurate if they gave examples of other means for self injury as there are tons... .Not eating, drinking, compulsive shopping, etc.  So would be more relatable if the cutting was symbolic of all self injury and the other self injury methods were listed to make such a connection, or flashed fast as options of the self injury category.   (There are so many pwBPD who do not cut, or ceased it and many persons deny their Dx based on this, as do their SO. Well. She doesn't self injure... .  That would be an unfortunate misunderstanding to not clarify.)

I liked the dancer, expressing the words.
The contrast to the dancer tho was the female in bed, more depressed than real life anger being demonstrated.  I rather the other gals acting match the words more too, not just be dormant, passive, when describing tornado stuff.  She did not appear to rage or such during that.  Would be more relatable if there was a minor rage.

The title: I am borderline
I both love and hate this.  
Reason: as a medical professional I was taught to never call someone their diagnosis. Never: that polio man.  Always: that man with polio.
Yet, I love the idea of BPD being personified.  Wish though the connection of that was made more clear.  Maybe introduce the dancer very clearly, enlarge her as stating I am borderline, make her twirl the words away, idk... .something... .then back view up so she can dance at the size needed.  Then connect her more clearly to the other actress by adding a fade in/out or overlap views or such to connect that is what the girl is experiencing.

That way, "borderline" is clearly the dancer, not the person the dancer is expressing the inner world of.

Lastly, I feel Jessica84 makes a decent point about the lack of self awareness that is a hallmark of the disorder, certainly seems worthy and necessary to express this aspect in order to be relatable.  Having part of the script read, "and I have all these feelings and they confuse me, disorient me, I loose my footing, I try to do xyz to regain my balance, and I feel I am failing.  I don't even know where they(feelings)came from or where to put them" or something that conveys the confusion they experience about what is happening during this tornado of emotion.  

Oh, I do appreciate the balanced way that the writer did not villanize and such, but to not show a rage depicted, is a bit too "kid glove" imo for relatives to believe that this is about their relative who does rage, is not mostly in bed depressed, and doesn't cut.  Not that most with BPD are not in bed or are, just that a family member seeking help via video is likely motivated more by the rage, shopping sprees, etc, than the passive symptoms... .so the quite time their partner is sleeping off shame is not so on the radar maybe... . So thinking the rage and more self injury options should not be avoided, but included.

Thanks. We wanted to get staff and member feedback for the producer.



Date: Jul-2016Minutes: 1:18
Betsy Usher Acceptance Speech