Introduction/searching for coping mechanisms

[RunImmuno96]

Hello,
My 19-year-old sister has BPD and I am seeking coping strategies for both myself and my parents. Her impulsive behavior and angry outbursts have put a great deal of strain on the rest of the family--so much so that we often argue amongst ourselves. Does anyone else have a sibling with BPD? If so, how have you and your family dealt with his or her symptoms? Any advice would be very much appreciated. Thank you.

[Janneke]

Hi RunImmuno96,

 I am 29 and have a 20 year old sibling with undiagnosed BPD. You are not alone!
 My general coping mechanism is exercise - I can handle anything as long as I got my morning workout in   
 It sounds, however, like you are looking for more in the moment ways to deal. Validating can be really helpful - "that sounds frustrating"; "I'm sorry you're upset" and the like.
 It's really important not to add to the drama. One other moderators will provide some good links for you, I am sure.
 Are you a younger or older sibling?
 J

[Naughty Nibbler]

Welcome RunImmuno96: 
I'm sorry about your sister's behavior.  I can understand how angry outbursts can disrupt the dynamics in a family

It's good that you are reaching out for advice. Your best approach is to learn various strategies and communication techniques to change the way you interact and react. The Karpman Drama Triangle workshop can help you learn about healthy triangles, versus unhealthy ones.  There is a bit of a learning curve involved and some practice.  It is always best to avoid argument (and for her to not notice a reaction on your part).  Check out the two links below:

AVOIDING CIRCULAR ARGUMENTS
bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=118892.0;all

KARPMAN DRAMA TRIANGLE
https://bpdfamily.com/content/karpman-drama-triangle

Boundaries can be important for you.  They are for the sanity of you and your parents.  Your sister will likely overstep them, but they are up to you to enforce.  Using Validation can make a difference, as well as various communication skills.  Check out the links below (click on the green words or green addresses).  There are, also, links to the right of this post, that lead to additional helpful information.

SETTING  BOUNDARIES

VALIDATION

COMMUNICATIONS OVERIVEW

Check out some of the links and let us know what you think.  It can be helpful to interact with others, as you learn some new skills.  There are a lot of helpful people who share their experiences.

Hope you have a better situation in 2017