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VIDEO: "What is parental alienation?" Parental alienation is when a parent allows a child to participate or hear them degrade the other parent. This is not uncommon in divorces and the children often adjust. In severe cases, however, it can be devastating to the child. This video provides a helpful overview.
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LikeEagles
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
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« on: January 14, 2017, 06:19:14 AM »

I'm new here.  I am in the process of a divorce and custody battle after 12 years of being married to a BPD/NPD (court ordered psych eval,  psychologist testified he believes he has it). I'm looking for support and advice... .a place to be reminded that I am not alone. 
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LilMe
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Together 10 years; now living apart since April 2016
Posts: 336



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« Reply #1 on: January 14, 2017, 09:29:27 AM »

 

I am sorry you are dealing with such a stressful situation! Unfortunately for us, you are not alone. 10 years, 3 children (2,8,9) for me. How old are your children? How are they handling things? Mine are struggling and it breaks my heart.

Let us know how we can help and support you. 
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livednlearned
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Family other
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 12750



« Reply #2 on: January 14, 2017, 11:08:33 AM »

Hi LikeEagles,

You are definitely not alone!

That is something that the psychologist testified that your soon-to-be-ex has BPD/NPD.

What kind of custody arrangement are you going for? How many kids, and how are they doing?

How are you doing?

LnL
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Breathe.
ForeverDad
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated 2005 then divorced
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You can't reason with the Voice of Unreason...


« Reply #3 on: January 17, 2017, 02:25:50 PM »

While you would do well to not hide his behaviors, understand that with regard to custody and parenting time courts will probably give much more focus to his parenting behaviors (that could impact the children and parenting) than to his adult behaviors.  So unless they're extreme don't list all your problems with him first, list the incidents and behaviors involving the children first.
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Freeagain2017

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 11


« Reply #4 on: January 17, 2017, 08:22:19 PM »

Welcome! Sorry you had to join us but you are not alone.
I am in a very similar situation. Two kids, 7 and 10. Married 12 years and trying to divorce for almost a year.
How did you convince the court/ psychologist to assess for NPD? I was told they usually don't assess for it.
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