Wife and I married turmoil

[John_alderson]

My wife and I have been struggling for some time now in our relationship. I've been dishonest with her. I've been abusive to her physically, mentally emotionally, and there's no trust between us. Anymore, however, I feel like she doesn't want to leave the relationship. And I don't either Is there any way any tips on regaining? Trust, and we're gaining that um. Sense of trust and sense of companionship, we would use to have

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[kells76]

Hello and welcome to the group 

Sounds like you and your wife have had significant challenges in your relationship. How long have the two of you been together, and were the challenges there from the start, or did they begin later in the relationship?

Trust issues are a big deal. Have the two of you, or either one of you solo, looked into therapy or counseling? Long-standing trust issues often require structured professional help... but there is hope.

I don't see any mention of BPD in your post... do you suspect that you or your wife (or both of you) may have it?

...

While there are no guarantees in life, what I can say is that if both of you are committed to working on your marriage, and getting help and support to learn new tools and skills like being less invalidating,  you may be able to make some positive, healthy changes.

Fill us in some more, whenever you get a chance;

kells76