Communication

[dtkm]

My uBPDh is not good at communication. When in his nice phase, he can hear what is being said and somewhat communicate to a lower level, but when he is splitting all of what has been communicated and agreed about goes out the window and he goes through a phase of not speaking, then yelling, none of which ever makes any sense. Luckily, last year he was forced to get another place to stay, so I can tell him during these times that he needs to stay there when he does this…and the kids are afraid of him during this time, so they all choose to stay at home. He will re-regulate, and go on as nothing has happened. I am getting to the point where I feel like I need to have some sort of communication with him at this switch back, but I’m not sure how to do so. Does anyone have any suggestions for how to start a conversation at this time? It doesn’t need to be a blaming one, more just saying something like please communicate when you change plans that involve the kids and don’t tell me, or something like this.

[PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES]

PLEASE - NO RUN MESSAGES This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members may appear frustrated but they are here for constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.