Intro

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hi, everyone!

I'm new to this group, and I've joined because I carry a lot of hurt, resentment and anger from growing up with a parent who has BPD. I find myself triggered every time I speak with this person, and the hurt lasts for hours if not days afterward. I'm an adult now--when am I going to be able to set an emotional boundary? I see it affecting my relationships with others and I'm about to enter a marriage. I wonder how this has affected me and will continue to affect my relationships... .Anyway, I'm hoping I will be able to help and support others who feel like they're stuck in a strange, irrational world that BPD creates and to perhaps experience connection from others in return.

[Annie S.]

Hi, everyone!

I'm new to this group, and I've joined because I carry a lot of hurt, resentment and anger from growing up with a parent who has BPD. I find myself triggered every time I speak with this person, and the hurt lasts for hours if not days afterward. I'm an adult now--when am I going to be able to set an emotional boundary? I see it affecting my relationships with others and I'm about to enter a marriage. I wonder how this has affected me and will continue to affect my relationships... .Anyway, I'm hoping I will be able to help and support others who feel like they're stuck in a strange, irrational world that BPD creates and to perhaps experience connection from others in return.

[Naughty Nibbler]

Welcome Annie S.:  
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding.  Weddings can be a very emotional event and a parent with BPD brings the potential to create problems and extra stress.   I'm so sorry about what you have had to go through with a BPD parent.  Is your parent getting any treatment for BPD, or has this parent gotten treatment in the past?

The lessons at the links below can be helpful for you. They can be a good place to start learning some strategy.

FOG
BOUNDARIES

You can't change your parent, but by managing the way you interact with and react to your parent can make things better for you.  Can you give us some examples of the most disturbing behaviors your parent currently exhibits?  Perhaps with some more details, we can help steer you to lessons/strategy that will help you the most right now.

We look forward to hearing more of you story.