Did anyone else find it powerful to type out the relationship history?

[Lalathegreat]

As part of my first post I laid out in a fairly detailed manner the entire history of my relationship with my BPD partner and I found that to be an incredibly powerful exercise.

I think it's so easy to get caught up in each crisis as it comes and while there is a loose sense of continuity, it isn't necessarily clear and organized. To really think through, examine, connect the dots, recognize the pattern, see the manipulation, and remember some of those darker moments has given me a small amount of clarity.

I know it's fragile, I know this awareness is in its infancy, but I am grateful for it.

[Ragnar1982]

I've considered this. Even when I sit back and reflect on the timeline of events, it amazes me how often I remember something else that I forgot bothered me so much in the moment. Either way, remembering those moments one way or another make me feel less guilty for leaving.

[Lalathegreat]

Oh my gosh Ragnar YES... .the guilt! What the heck is up with the guilt? He spat on me and chased me out of his apartment and then *I* feel guilty about leaving HIM in a fragile emotional moment? It seems obscene but I am so grateful to have found people hear who can understand it.