First few days of BPD

[Run422]

I am in shock, drained, fearful, and at a loss.  My wife of 30 years tried to kill herself last week by overdosing on pills, after 3 weeks of suddenly starting to cut herself with razors, in and out of hospital, uncertain diagnoses, and failure of the medical system to guide me in the right direction.  I had never heard of BPD before, never witnessed this escalation until three weeks ago, and am reading all I can get my hands on.  Main concern right now, though - I have no gas left in my tank, cannot process the near-death of my wife, and am on information overload.  She still needs to go through a detailed psych assessment to confirm that it is in fact BPD - she refuses to acknowledge that it could be.  I do not know the tips and techniques that seasoned veterans of this disorder use to protect themselves, to defuse the situation, or even how to talk to their BPD loved ones.  She is asleep now, and I am simply asking - "What do I do today, in the next couple of hours, when she wakes up and still does not want to talk about this?"  If this sounds desperate - it is.

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[Mutt]

Hi Run422, 



I'm so sorry. I'm glad to hear that your wife is OK, I can understand how emotionally distressing that feels when your spouse tries to take her own life, I can see how that would be awkward with knowing what to say because there could be a serious mental illness present. That being said, she's still the same person before this discovery? If she doesn't want to talk it's understandable, her reality is as real to her as yours is to you, she may not feel like there's something wrong with her. We have communication tools on the right side of the board -------------------> It helps to talk to people just like you to give you guidance and support. You're not alone.