I just don't feel she understands that the problem is on her and it's not mine or anyone elses thing to deal with.
She doesn't understand that BECAUSE other people have handled it for her. The longer this goes on... .the harder it will be... .if ever... for her to understand who is responsible for what.
I know this looks scary to you. I was there.
Grab some popcorn... .FF memory theater is about to begin. Yeah... .unfortunately it's a horror movie.
FF was too much of a wuss to keep his wife out of his email. She would find stuff... .twist it into all kinds of crazy... .she would finally "forgive" me for things I never did... .wash... rinse... .repeat...
This was before I "knew".
Well... .the senior guys on bpdfamily got to me and let me know that I "must hold" whenever I tried a boundary.
My first boundary was going to be my email. I changed the password and for a couple weeks my wife pretended not to notice. Then she asked gently... .I figured I had "gotten away with it... "
Riiiiiiight She expressed herself more forcefully... .I stayed calm and told her I was not hiding, but was being private and protecting my other relationships.
She was very frustrated I wouldn't "bite" and have it out.
Well... .that night I wanted to have sex. Luckily I was prepared for anything as the bpdfamily guys had warned me she would "try a new tool".
All prudes exit the thread... .FF is about to get busy... .
Well... .she has her hand on my "member" (which is unusual)... so she can "guide it in". She lets me feel the outside and as I start to push in she directs me away... .
I assume that she once again is having problems with my massiveness (been a lifelong issue for me... .
)... .
Nope... .
IN a husky voice... .think fatal attraction... ."FF... .I'll let you in there if you give me your password... .you know you want in there... ."
Dude... .
I've been c@ck blocked before... .but... .that kinda crosses a line... .
Somehow I held it together... .didn't react. I rolled off and said something to the effect of "that's ok... "
She doesn't really react either.
After a few minutes of her fuming... .I kid you not... .she acts like it's not big deal... .invites me back over to have sex. I did so... .
I survived the first extinction burst in fine form. Over the years she will ___ and moan about the password... .I don't pay it any attention.
It's been maybe 6 months since she mentioned it.
I tell you this to "on the one hand" warn you to be ready... .but also to assure you that if you hold... you will find hope.
Thoughts?
FF
