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Author Topic: 3 hours and counting...  (Read 347 times)
Scyphozoan

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 17


« on: April 16, 2017, 03:55:03 PM »

 He is Back after 4 months... .My dear family... .

He tried over the past 3 months to email me, but I went no contact... .

To remind you... .he wanted me to babysit his son who just came for a visit from Switzerland Christmas Vaca... .and his daughter who is 26 years old from previous relationships, no marriage... .but he is very wealthy and supporting his children's in College... .

He had asked it ws our 3rd time around... .and I have promised, to help while he is out of town... .

He calls me from the airport, stating the 26 years old, who still lives with daddy, and just came back herself from vacation in the Swiss Alps, feels awkward, that we all together... .( mind you, I never lived there and although he had made promises to move in together, the only action he had done, while we broke up in July, was down size, move to MY TOWN>> > and have his daughter lives with him... .


The last straw and this is why I am writing to you, is that I was asked to leave, which I changed my number and maintained no contact,  he bought a flight ticket the day I left... .( says it was his daughter... .for her mother... .)... .

The mother stayed with them for 10 days... .in January, she is a 49 yrs old swiss waitress... .he all along told me she came from an afluent family, and is waiting for her inheritance... .I never asked, I don't care, but he " the usual triangulation", after the 3rd week we met told me that he slept with his " Daughter mother... ." 2 years ago... .and that he regrets that... .(  because since than I don't trust him/her)... .

He travels frequently once a month or twice a month for business, but I put a stop to it... .back in July, because I wanted someone to share life with everyday not 2 weeks out of the month... .and decided to brek up... .still loved him, but couldn't deal with the long distance and the doubts... .

He is an Ex- GrandPri driver... .so " adrenaline Junkie"... .

Let's fst forward... .during the " converstaion " we had on the phone from the airport, I was so hurt... .mind you it was so sudden... .He cancelled his " European" meeting... .to come home, I had left by than, he had asked me to leave the details of the schools teachers etc... .which I did... .
 and txted me: " I will not bother you... .I love you but you never understood who I realy am... .no fight... .no... .tension... .let's be elegant... .Just let me know what I need to do from here... ."... .

4 days later He bought a flight ticket to the mother of his daughter... ." 350/; Euro... .really wealthy family... .


Now here we are Sunday April 16 and he has been emailing me for a week ( goes to my garbage)... ." Please please can you send me a picture of you... .( Feb. was a year, I guess he needed to destroy all evidents... .?"

Every single day 3 messages... ." I just miss hearing your voice"... .can you call me... .?"

BTW, I have a wattsapp screenshot that shows he spoke to the mother of his daghter ( for 45 ) minutes... .I finally, took my head out of the sand... .

But... .it is 4:31 pm... .and he asking for face to face conversation... .I refused all weekend... .while he is keepping on the pressure, to the point I had the runs... ." Please you see how you are, your words have no value, you agree than you recant"... .My Dear Dear family... .What do I do... .I have agreed to talk to him as a friend... .he sent me a sentimental song called " Ne me quitte pas with english translation... .and now another email... .- thinking about you all day... .

Apologies precious family memebers for the typos, I have no intentions of getting back with him... .and he feels that... .he just wants to remains friends... .( which we all know including me... ." what a joke"... .
I just couldn't escaped the claws... .so here i am writing to you, hoping for a sound advice, where I can spend 120 minutes... .with the same retoric, looking into my eyes, swearing, I am and always have been his only relationships... .( my gut tells me otherwise... .)... .
But Guys, what if I let a BPD, vent, tells his fantasies, going a long with his " predicted speeches"... .of how I should take full responsibility... .since he fell in love with me the moment he saw me... .( )... .

What or should I ask, how should I be careful... .( emotionally Gaga... .will not happened this time around... .)... .He is trying to soften me up... .but how does  one ( me), keep their values, of no more " crap"... ." you can have any woman in the world you want... .so go for it"... .and walk away with my humanistic attitude intact... .
Trusting people,  falling in love all the things that gives us hope... .

How do I protect my " core"... .
Maybe he wants to confess... .great... .a bit to little too late... .who knows... .

I am getting ready, I know all of you have been in my shoes before... .( size 9 M)... .1 hour and 45 minutes to this dreadful meeting... .( maybe the purpose is for me... ." Hey... .I am as great as ever... ., it was nice knowing you... ."... .what do i have to prove... .? and or why do i have to prove... .?
Any words of encouragments will help, any words of wisdom will help, why are they going back to something that didn't work... .?   

When i come back... .I promise to tell you how it went... .

meanwhile can you read my post, while I get ready... .and possible, arm me with some sensibility... .
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Scyphozoan

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 17


« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2017, 12:15:55 AM »

well... .I am back... .more confused than before... .

He was nice, he had an absolute answer for everything and everyone else but my feelings... .

He said he loves me... .and that he thinks/thought of me multiple times... .a day... .
I was there, but very guarded... .of course he did not " remeber" saying those things, or writing those things... .
when I asked questions... .I got the why do you always look for a fight... .( merely a question... .)... .

He started talking about " a future together"... .want us to have another chance... .,to which I replied, " this was your idea, you wanted face to face"... .to talk to me and ... .
No... .I got no answers... .

before I left " with an uber"... .he asked... .when will you call me... .?   

I replied... .soon... .

I dislike confrontations, and moreover, I get no answers... .he just wants the whole thing to disappear... .4 months, he said he all he did was thinking of me... .while having his Ex- girlfriend, whom he sent a ticket, BTW, the version is now... ." he bought the ticket, I wrote down, exactly what he said back in January... ." My daughter made a mistake in the dates... .

I had a little time to think... .( BTW he doesn't have my number... .

The whole thing makes no sense... .

He lies/lied so much, he forgot his own lies... .

I needed to go, because I felt guilty... .all this time, the " guilty party, never looked back ( well maybe once or twice with emails... .)

I am done... .I don't want life of doubt and speculations... .if you care and love someone, and you want things to work out, you try... .

BTW... .his 26 years old daughter just moved in with her new boyfriend... ." felling lonely, are we... .?

I must admit, it does a " number on your head... ."... .but it will not be as destructive and disturbing as the " fatal blow in January... .

These last couple of days were exhausting... .anxious and frankly, I don't know what was I expecting... .( I actually do knw... .how about... ." I am sorry I had made no attempt to introduce you etc... .back than... .) not now... .

I am actually writing an email... .of what I was expecting and since... .we didn't get to talk about anything... .I wish him the best of luck... .

looks like she has been recycled in the last 30 years... .( why woul d anyone do this to themselves... .?)I don't want to end up like that... .
I belive in the goodness of people... .but BPD's  will destroy that " hope", and life without hope are not worth living... .

Going to bed... .need a restful night... .and him out of my head... .it has been a misrable week... .!



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