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Author Topic: husband with signs of BPD  (Read 473 times)
bear01
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 1


« on: May 09, 2017, 07:32:42 AM »

My husband shows signs of BPD... .I don't know what to do? Just got married in October 2016
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Springer
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
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« Reply #1 on: May 09, 2017, 08:51:28 AM »

I am long time in a BPD relationship and am just now trying the Yale communication process with my SO.
1. State the problem: "When dishes are overflowing the sink."
2. State what the problem does to you: "I feel frustrated, because I've been at work all day."
3. State why its a problem: "I am hungry and want to get right on to making dinner, but can't." Then wait for a reaction.
4. State what you will do: "I will have to eat a frozen dinner."

Its like learning a new language for me. I want to go right into victim mode, then caretaker. This approach is helpful when I can pull it off.
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Mutt
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced Oct 2015
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« Reply #2 on: May 09, 2017, 09:40:57 PM »

Hi bear01,

Welcome

I'd like to join Springer and welcome you to bpdfamily. You're newlyweds. I'd like to echo Springer, there are different tools for different situations, PUVAS, DEARMAN, SET and validation. A pwBPD need a lot of validation because they have low self esteem, low self worth,  self loath and self hate.

What signs do you see in your H?
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