Hi

[August Molly]

Hi, I'm a new member, my sister has BPD, it's very hard to have any kind of relationship with her!

[lovesherfam]

Welcome!

[Pina colada]

Hi August Molly.  Can you tell us a little more about your situation?  You will find much support here and know you are not alone!

[August Molly]

My sister has BPD and it's impossible to have any kind of equal relationship with her.  I don't hear from her for several months (which I'm not unhappy about because she's such hard work), then she decides to contact me and if I don't immediately respond (within minutes of a text) then she bombards me with increasingly emotional texts and phone messages ("I've obviously upset you I'm sorry" and "Please can we talk so I can try to make amends?", then comes knocking on my door, by which point I certainly don't want to see or talk to her because it's then very confrontational.  She even resorts to phoning my son "because she's very worried that she hasn't been able to get hold of me".  She doesn't understand that I don't expect anything from her (I've realised this) but she insists on carrying on the pretence that we are close loving sisters - even calling me by an childhood nickname in an effort to press my buttons.  I have tried to talk to her several times over the years and her response has always been "I hear what you say and I take it on board" however the behaviour is repeated again and again and again.  I know that I'm wasting my breath but she seems stuck in this ever repeating cycle of pushing me away and then she has these dramatic impulsive attempts to repair the damage.  I'd be very grateful for any advice on how to handle these episodes.