Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
March 29, 2024, 07:46:06 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
84
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Update She's in therapy what should I expect?  (Read 356 times)
montenell

*
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Relationship status: married
Posts: 46



« on: August 14, 2017, 09:02:49 AM »

So the wife is now seeing a therapist and I have been redirecting a lot of her efforts to draw me in to the therapist. Just curious as what to expect during this time. Now that I have been putting my foot down I'm being told " I feel bullied", " I don't like this new you", "you make me feel like you don't want to be in a relationship with me".  At a point where I am completely unfazed by these attempts. I guess I have become a "gray rock".! It's funny the therapist is giving her the same advice that I've been giving for years but I feel like the load has been lightened. One minute she's saying she needs some space and for me to "pull back" the next minute I'm not making enough effort SMH. For those of you who have been thru this part of it what has typically been your experience once they attemp to get help?
Logged
Torched
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 133


« Reply #1 on: August 14, 2017, 05:02:33 PM »

My ex wife wouldn't share anything at all with me concerning therapy.  Not a thing.  I did not pressure her.  She was put on SSRI medication, and quit therapy after a couple of months.  She stopped much of her BPD behavior as she was smart enough at that point to know that I was finished if she so much as fell off the wagon.  She was a very intelligent person and knew what the real issues were.  I felt bad about her feeling like the other shoe was going to drop any time, but she did a good job of just eating it every time she was in a situation where she was going to behave as a BPD would react.  The problem was that without being herself (BPD-like), there was just nothing left.  There was nothing to her.  She was not comfortable just being her.  That's when she started drinking a half bottle or more of wine every day after work.  She didn't have any of the BPD over-the-top tendencies toward dangerous behaviors until then.  I think I kept her from it up until that point by being Mr. Helpful and eating crap sandwiches.  Me eating her crap sandwiches kept her... .satisfied if that makes sense.

Her therapist tried to get me to join them early on.  I went in and enlightened the therapist, who pretty much gave me a pass and moved on.  I am not certain if she was officially diagnosed or treated as BPD.  Either way, I'm guessing therapy won't last long and you won't get anything from her about it.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!