Its been awhile - how are you doing?

[believer55]

Hi all. I realised I only post here when things are bad and I feel I have nowhere to turn and suddenly thought that that is not good enough. I am posting today to say that the ups and downs continue and I am still struggling and I am tired... .oh so tired.

But more importantly ... .how are you doing? What have you tried and what is working.

hwBPD has had 3 dbt sessions and we saw benefits straight away - now he tells me he doesn't have BPD and I diagnosed him and all he has is abandonment issues. So I now see the frustrations of not sticking with therapy. We have started MC for the 2nd time and already he doesn't like the counsellor as she questions his reactions and makes him confront where the emotions come from.

So these are not looking good for me - what have you been trying?

B x

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Tattered Heart]

Hi all. I realised I only post here when things are bad and I feel I have nowhere to turn and suddenly thought that that is not good enough. I am posting today to say that the ups and downs continue and I am still struggling and I am tired... .oh so tired.

Continuing to post when things are going smoothly or just "ok" are the times when I have done the most growth. I can focus on practicing new skills to help improve things instead of just trying to survive the intensity of the moment. It also allows me to help others and in advising them, I learn all kinds of new things about myself.

I'm sorry that counseling hasn't gone very well. pwBPD are often so resistant to getting help. If he drops out of counseling, will you continue T for yourself?

[Mutt]

Hi believer55,



Welcome back! I read your post as good news bad news. I'm glad that you chose to come back for support.

How did it go in MC last time?

[Radcliff]

Welcome back, believer55!  Let me echo Tattered Heart's comment about making progress in good times.  I am definitely working to get out of the same rut of only examining things when they are going off the rails.  Become a regular with me!

Wentworth

[believer55]

I am trying to keep the momentum going

Easier now as things have been going downhill. I think I have hit a bit of a wall so I am trying less. I am attending a support group but most of the attendees are older parents with adult children with BPD so as a spouse it is a little different. It is nice to be reminded you are not alone though.

I have recommended these boards to others in the group as I feel this place is a great resource and a safe place to express how we are feeling.

Thanks to everyone for sharing