Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
March 29, 2024, 07:44:38 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Things we can't ignore
What Does it Take to Be in a Relationship
Why We Struggle in Our Relationships
Is Your Relationship Breaking Down?
Codependency and Codependent Relationships
93
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: New to group—the decision to leave or stay is torture.  (Read 407 times)
rose3tiger
Fewer than 3 Posts
*
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 1


« on: February 21, 2018, 02:40:31 PM »

Thankful to have found this site knowing I’m with others in similar struggles. Husband has BPD, and his Dr. Jeckyll/Mr. Hyde behavior is overwhelming. Don’t want to be with him anymore, but we have kids. The decision to leave or stay is torture. Very strong in my faith, so I know God will lead me. Yet, I have moments like this where I am just fed up and want to get out of the marriage now!
Logged
RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

isilme
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 2714



« Reply #1 on: February 21, 2018, 04:27:07 PM »

Hi- I have been making use of this site for about 10 years, and while I admit it's been a slow process, I've been able to see an overall decrease in day-to-day drama and if nothing else, it gives me a GOOD place to "talk" to people who know what I am talking about and won't jump to useless advice like,"just leave".  Type away :D  It helps.
Logged

JoeBPD81
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 709



WWW
« Reply #2 on: February 23, 2018, 04:22:37 AM »

Welcome

As our wise owl said, things do get better. And we are here to listen and not judge you. We are all in the same boat.

A good number of people here are Christians, and you will find posts where we find comforrt and guidance in the Scriptures.

I'm very sorry you've suffered the Jeckyll/Hide behavior that we are so familiar about. But I'm glad you found us. Can you share a little bit more of your story? How old are your kids? Is your husband diagnosed?

I have two kids (6 & 11), they are not biologicaly mine, but they depend on me staying. I know about the feeling that you must stay, even when you need to leave, even when the best thing is to leave (for a few hours at least).

We all have moments of desperation when we know for sure we can't take it one more day. And then one day we have our forces renewed, and we have hope again. Talking about it helps me a lot. Even when I don't find answers, I know I'm not alone. So many wonderful people are experiencing the same things I do. Incredibly generous, talented and kind people hear the same rejections as I do, so maybe I'm not as bad as my GF paints me, you know?
Logged

We are in this together.
pearlsw
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 2801


"Be kind whenever possible, it is always possible"


« Reply #3 on: February 24, 2018, 11:30:21 AM »

Hi rose3tiger,

Want to list out the reasons to stay and go with us? Talk it out a bit... .

take care, pearl.
Logged

Walk on a rainbow trail, walk on a trail of song, and all about you will be beauty. There is a way out of every dark mist, over a rainbow trail. - Navajo Song
Notgoneyet
**
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married since 8/8/82 seprtd&divorced 3 yrs Remarried since then.
Posts: 75



WWW
« Reply #4 on: February 25, 2018, 11:03:10 PM »

 welcome rose3tiger,
  I'm another newbie ,only been serious w this site for a few days now but the more I read, the more I learn, and share, the better I feel !  I've been married to my BP wife for 35 yrs and have had to struggle to stay married to her more then a few times. My belief in marriage and not wanting my 2 boys  growing up in a broken marriage was driving force for that. My BP wife was is still is an AWESOME Mom to them & some how maintained that even with her BPD struggles. I took a lot of the blame for most of the bad times. Still I have no regrets. knowing now what I now of the illness I have to believe God guided us through the rough times & blessed us w Many Good times. We we're blessed to find a really good BP therapist and am praying I can get her back to her soon.   
     Learned a lot of how to get along much better with my BPw  by reading Stop walking on eggs shells. Prayers to you.
Logged

Notgoneyet
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!