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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: Flabbergasted: Share only your craziest experiences here  (Read 514 times)
introvert

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 24


« on: March 26, 2018, 04:40:35 PM »

Let's try to have some fun. I'll start.

1. pwBPD literally peed all over 1/4 of my bedroom floor after I told her I couldn't continue to see her

2. First BPD ex cheated on me and used "you didn't show me enough attention" as justification. Then months later had the nerve to try to contact me complaining about that same perceived lack of attention, which was never even communicated to me. .

3. Multiple counts across both girls of an unwillingness to leave my property. Crazy that I let that happen more than once

4. Knocking over a near-full wine bottle on purpose due to my not wanting to answer a certain question and remaining silent

What stories absolutely blow your mind? Looking forward to reading.
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Heartachex2

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 29


« Reply #1 on: March 26, 2018, 05:00:34 PM »

Introvert,
My ex wife was diagnosed BPD-NPD and my ex-gf is undiagnosed (I truly believe she's BPD-NPD), so I'll share a few stories.

Ex-gf
1. We're supposed to have a talk at her house. Texts me and says that she's feeling sick but if I wanna come over I can. Told her it was okay I was coming over. Go over and she tells me that the bottle of wine her cousin and her shared had high alcohol content so she was hungover. I noted that there were 2 empty bottles of wine on the counter. She asked me whether I was calling her a liar and I pointed out that there were 2 open bottles of wine. She then says they only had one. Then proceeds to try to find the alcohol content of it (only 8%) and is puzzled why she was hungover after 1 bottle. Twenty minutes later we're talking and she says "So when we opened the second bottle of wine we knew that we were gonna get drunk so we said ___ it and just continued to drink." I responded with "But I thought you said you guys only split one bottle of wine." Her: "Are you calling me a liar?"

2. Thursday afternoon tells me about how perfect her life is and how she can't wait to spend the rest of her life with me. Talks about how she can't wait to move in together and she has thought of the colors that she wants to use in our bedroom, etc. That same Sunday tells me that she wants to be just friends because I'm overwhelming her with my talk of the future.

I'll stop there with her... .so many more stories

Ex-wife
1. She cheated on me and so I confronted her about it and wanted to end it. Her response "I want to work things out with you, but I also want to continue to see J to get him out of my system."'

2. We go in to the mediator's office to mediate our divorce agreement. While we're waiting for the mediator to call us in, she comes and sits on my lap and starts kissing me on the cheek telling me how much she loves me and wants to pick out my future wife because I'm such an amazing guy and how I deserve an amazing woman. This was in front of our divorce attorneys who both looked at us like we were crazy. I was literally flabbergasted.

I could also go on, but I think these examples should get us started.
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JNChell
a.k.a. "WTL"
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Dissolved
Posts: 3520



« Reply #2 on: March 26, 2018, 06:17:39 PM »

My craziest experience was realizing and accepting that I have a grocery list of issues just like her. Thankfully, I’m able to see it.
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“Adversity can destroy you, or become your best seller.”
-a new friend
Lady Itone
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What is your sexual orientation: Gay, lesb
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 238



« Reply #3 on: March 26, 2018, 07:12:11 PM »

Let's try to have some fun. I'll start.

1. pwBPD literally peed all over 1/4 of my bedroom floor after I told her I couldn't continue to see her

Good one.

My gf ate the street drug known as "bath salts" combined with adderall and tried to steal a police car. Lol. Sometimes I really miss that crazy b****.
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introvert

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 24


« Reply #4 on: March 27, 2018, 12:04:17 AM »

Introvert,
My ex wife was diagnosed BPD-NPD and my ex-gf is undiagnosed (I truly believe she's BPD-NPD), so I'll share a few stories.

Ex-gf
1. We're supposed to have a talk at her house. Texts me and says that she's feeling sick but if I wanna come over I can. Told her it was okay I was coming over. Go over and she tells me that the bottle of wine her cousin and her shared had high alcohol content so she was hungover. I noted that there were 2 empty bottles of wine on the counter. She asked me whether I was calling her a liar and I pointed out that there were 2 open bottles of wine. She then says they only had one. Then proceeds to try to find the alcohol content of it (only 8%) and is puzzled why she was hungover after 1 bottle. Twenty minutes later we're talking and she says "So when we opened the second bottle of wine we knew that we were gonna get drunk so we said ___ it and just continued to drink." I responded with "But I thought you said you guys only split one bottle of wine." Her: "Are you calling me a liar?"

2. Thursday afternoon tells me about how perfect her life is and how she can't wait to spend the rest of her life with me. Talks about how she can't wait to move in together and she has thought of the colors that she wants to use in our bedroom, etc. That same Sunday tells me that she wants to be just friends because I'm overwhelming her with my talk of the future.

I'll stop there with her... .so many more stories

Ex-wife
1. She cheated on me and so I confronted her about it and wanted to end it. Her response "I want to work things out with you, but I also want to continue to see J to get him out of my system."'

2. We go in to the mediator's office to mediate our divorce agreement. While we're waiting for the mediator to call us in, she comes and sits on my lap and starts kissing me on the cheek telling me how much she loves me and wants to pick out my future wife because I'm such an amazing guy and how I deserve an amazing woman. This was in front of our divorce attorneys who both looked at us like we were crazy. I was literally flabbergasted.

I could also go on, but I think these examples should get us started.
Feel free to go on if you have more. These are all gold. Can't help but be interested in the nuttiness of it all.
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Heartachex2

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 29


« Reply #5 on: March 27, 2018, 08:16:45 AM »

Introvert,
Here are a couple more

Ex-gf
1. The first 9 months of our relationship she treated me like a king. Literally cooked for me, came over to my house, cleaned it, we had sex 7-10 times a week, etc etc. It was literally anything I could ever want, but never asked her to do any of that stuff for me. Then 9 months in she tells me, I can't be this woman you want me to be. You want me to be Susie Homemaker and for us to have sex all the time and be perfect. This isn't who I am... .me "huh? I didn't ask for you to be a homemaker or anything. Just asked you to be you"

2. She texted me over Thanksgiving to let me know that we shouldn't get each other any Christmas presents because I was buying a house for us. She then repeated that same sentiment when we went out to dinner about a two weeks before Christmas. Christmas day she gives me several presents. I told her that I didn't have anything because she had told me not to get her anything. She said "Oh no, I told you we shouldn't get anything too expensive for each other". I went back and looked at my texts to confirm that I wasn't mistaken... .tried to show her her text and she simply responded back with "I meant that we shouldn't buy anything too expensive" even though her exact text was "We shouldn't get each other any presents for Christmas because I know you spent so much on the house"

List goes on... .

Ex-wife

1. I'm in the bathroom sitting on the toilet and she barges in and tells me "You know how lucky you are to have been married to me. I'm better than you at everything, sports, I'm smarter, more artistic, better looking"
She then walks out as if it was completely normal to interrupt someone using the restroom to tell them that.

2. I'm sending our taxes over to our accountant. She tells me "You shouldn't send your taxes to your accountant because he doesn't know what he's doing. You should just pay me, I know how to do taxes better than he does. He always costs us so much money"

I have 12 years worth of gold with my ex-wife... .only 1 year worth with my ex-gf
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introvert

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 24


« Reply #6 on: March 27, 2018, 12:02:39 PM »

1. I'm in the bathroom sitting on the toilet and she barges in and tells me "You know how lucky you are to have been married to me. I'm better than you at everything, sports, I'm smarter, more artistic, better looking"
She then walks out as if it was completely normal to interrupt someone using the restroom to tell them that.

I'm dead. I can picture your face as you're sitting there trying to have a ___.

I also had odd bathroom experiences with both BPDs. I don't know if it's an odd attempt at creating comfort but both would pull me onto their lap while they peed on occasion and one would often ask me if I wanted to watch her. Both have sat on my lap when I was trying to get a ___ out as well. Had to shoo them off. Truly odd.
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