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Author Topic: Speak your truth even though you will be ignored, laughed at, dismissed and dim  (Read 501 times)
pbnjsandwich

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« on: March 27, 2018, 04:51:40 PM »

Franz Kafka was said to be a major figure of 20th century literature.  He had a beautifully poetic way of writing. Even his letter to his father was written courageously, lovingly and considerately. You can read the voice that spoke on his own behalf and how important it was for him to say what he had to say. Today, as I re-read it, I feel as though Kafka is speaking for me as well, and probably for you. It dawned on me how many actors, writers, comedians and singers have had to deal with issues in their family. Their voice became their career and, although we might not share in that, we can share our voice with those in our life that are suffering with BPD.

During the time when my father was still alive, I realized how important my voice was to me.  Sometimes I would find myself repeating the same sentence to him over and over without even a hint of a raised voice.  I would simply say, "I can't. I'm sorry that you think I don't care, but I'm in the middle of something and I can't."

Our voices might not seem important, but they are profoundly important because WE can hear it.  It doesn't matter if they don't, it matters that we do.

Speak your truth even though you will be ignored, laughed at, dismissed and diminished.  
If you have a moment in your day, read, "Kafka's letter to his father." It's available to read online.
 
Enjoy your Tuesday ♥

www.heavysideindustries.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/Franz-Kafka-Letter-to-his-father1.pdf

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bluek9
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« Reply #1 on: March 28, 2018, 02:09:54 PM »

 pbnjsandwich,

       Thank you, thank you! So very well said to so many who need to take it in, myself included. So often we loose sight of ourselves in the madness of mental illness. I totally agree with the statement " it doesn't matter if they don't, it maters that we do". We need to keep our own voices in our ears. We need to her ourselves say, not now, or I can't. I find it very empowering to myself to be able to say no. It lets me not put the expectation of being SUPER MOM on my shoulders.
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pbnjsandwich

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« Reply #2 on: March 28, 2018, 04:25:03 PM »

pbnjsandwich,

       Thank you, thank you! So very well said to so many who need to take it in, myself included. So often we loose sight of ourselves in the madness of mental illness. I totally agree with the statement " it doesn't matter if they don't, it maters that we do". We need to keep our own voices in our ears. We need to her ourselves say, not now, or I can't. I find it very empowering to myself to be able to say no. It lets me not put the expectation of being SUPER MOM on my shoulders.
We need to learn to be kind to ourselves, first. No matter what we say to others will only come a cross effectively if we are honest with ourselves, first. It's only our voice that matters. ♥
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Harri
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« Reply #3 on: March 28, 2018, 05:00:50 PM »

Hi pbj sandwich.

I'm with bluek9 in saying thank you.  I like it!  So often we shrink ourselves down and make ourselves small in fear of the reaction we may get.  Our voices are powerful and important and I agree that we need to hear them. 

The first time I read Kafka's The Metamorphosis I was totally captivated by the idea of alienation.  He was alienated from everything in his life, but most especially from himself.

Excerpt
During the time when my father was still alive, I realized how important my voice was to me.  Sometimes I would find myself repeating the same sentence to him over and over without even a hint of a raised voice.  I would simply say, "I can't. I'm sorry that you think I don't care, but I'm in the middle of something and I can't."
I am impressed that you were not just able to speak up, but able to keep your dignity.  When I started speaking up, I was frustrated, hurt, angry and often yelling.  I was okay with that though and still am okay with it.  I needed to hear myself saying the words, saying no, expressing my anger.  Our words, even our self talk is so important.  We hear it, our brains work to form the sentences, we feel the words on our lips.  Everything gets reinforced.

Thanks for posting his letter.  I hadn't read it before.  I only skimmed it so far but I am not surprised that he wrote The Metamorphosis or with his other works after reading it.
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  "What is to give light must endure burning." ~Viktor Frankl
OuttaDaFog

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« Reply #4 on: March 28, 2018, 05:24:46 PM »

Thanks for posting, pbnjsandwich.

Harri, I have to agree with you
Excerpt
When I started speaking up, I was frustrated, hurt, angry and often yelling.  I was okay with that though and still am okay with it.  I needed to hear myself saying the words, saying no, expressing my anger.
.  It was very empowering to hear myself speaking my mind and saying what I felt, not what I thought my UstbxBPDw wanted to hear to avoid a reaction.  I still look at the eggs in an egg carton and shake my head, thinking, "I used to walk on them."   Smiling (click to insert in post)
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pbnjsandwich

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« Reply #5 on: March 28, 2018, 11:10:40 PM »

Hi pbj sandwich.

I'm with bluek9 in saying thank you.  I like it!  So often we shrink ourselves down and make ourselves small in fear of the reaction we may get.  Our voices are powerful and important and I agree that we need to hear them. 

The first time I read Kafka's The Metamorphosis I was totally captivated by the idea of alienation.  He was alienated from everything in his life, but most especially from himself.
I am impressed that you were not just able to speak up, but able to keep your dignity.  When I started speaking up, I was frustrated, hurt, angry and often yelling.  I was okay with that though and still am okay with it.  I needed to hear myself saying the words, saying no, expressing my anger.  Our words, even our self talk is so important.  We hear it, our brains work to form the sentences, we feel the words on our lips.  Everything gets reinforced.

Thanks for posting his letter.  I hadn't read it before.  I only skimmed it so far but I am not surprised that he wrote The Metamorphosis or with his other works after reading it.
He certainly was.  When I read his letter, I found myself trying to talk to him. I felt so bad for him. He reminded me of a man I met once. He confided in me that he came from a very, overbearing father and that he lost his voice.  I was so proud of him for his accomplishments that resulted from that.  I asked him if he saw his own worth, he said, "I don't know... .I'm trying to." That's really all that matters is that you begin to see how wonderful you are.
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