Hello, AnnG!
Please allow me to join
zachira in welcoming you to the discussion forums. I'm so sorry for what you're going through but glad you have found a community where many of us have been through similar experiences, and we can learn from each other. I believe that you have found the best place in the world for understanding, compassion, and education as it relates to BPD, or facing emotionally intense relationships (as the byline of our logo says). So…we support each other here. I was a little scared when I joined, but mostly about having my fears confirmed. Now that they have been, I'm feeling much better.
So, again, welcome!
Thank you for sharing with us what you have thus far:
I know that setting boundaries are essential and I am committed to setting whatever boundaries I can. Any advice would be great.
Yes, boundary-setting is going to be paramount to your being able to deal with this situation and to protect whatever you have left of a calm life. Your recognizing this already gives you a leg up on the process of reclaiming your life.
You are among peers, friend. Unfortunately, there are legions of us! I'm so sorry you are experiencing this. However, I think you'll find a lot of parallels here - lots of members (including me) have similar stories. You will see from reading the posts here that you are far from alone.
There are also site articles and helpful tools that can be utilized by you to help you navigate this relationship. The tools are for YOU, but in time, hopefully, they will assist in improving your overall relationship with your roommate. Please find the Tools and Lessons located in the right-handed panel, and work through them as you're able.
I believe you will be greatly comforted by the support here and the fact that we really understand what you are going through. We've all been there to varying degrees. Take care of yourself. We will look out for future posts from you.
Keep writing, keep processing, keep learning!
-Speck