Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
March 29, 2024, 02:17:45 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Experts share their discoveries [video]
99
Could it be BPD
BPDFamily.com Production
Listening to shame
Brené Brown, PhD
What is BPD?
Blasé Aguirre, MD
What BPD recovery looks like
Documentary
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Meeting new people, should I be "vigilant" about BPD?  (Read 877 times)
itsmeSnap
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 458


"Tree of the young brave king"


« on: January 05, 2019, 01:56:33 AM »

Hello everyone

Its been about two months since my gf stopped talking to me, been posting here for about that much and also asking for advice on some issues of my own.

Anyway, I'm getting over all that and I'm quite "zenlike" this new year. I'm moving away to a new place, been planning it for a while now (before the breakup so unrelated to that) but now with this newly acquired perspective on my own draw and dynamic to people with BPD I want to get your opinion on something:

Should I be on the lookout for people with BPD traits when meeting new people or just "whatever happens"?

I'm curious as to what others have experienced after a relationship with a pwBPD, I read a few cases where even with careful "vetting" of potential partners people seem to end up right back on BPD land.

Don't mean to make it sound like BPD is something "to be avoided", but we all know the issues around it and its effects on our own lives (its the "learning after" board after all).

Thoughts/comments?
Logged

Not all those who wander are lost
Sirnut
**
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Friend
Posts: 89


« Reply #1 on: January 05, 2019, 04:45:10 AM »

I think the idea of being on the lookout specifically for BPD is probably not that healthy. Actually I’d see it as a form of black and white thinking that puts people into boxes - BPD or non - which seems a bit paranoid and not very respectful. Besides, there are a lot more things that can derail a relationship than just BPD traits.

The lesson I’ve drawn is a more general one, not specific to BPD, though I’m taking it from what I think personally has been a BPD-related experience.

That lesson is, you might not know a person as well as you think you do. There might be some hidden side to them that comes out only after you’ve invested yourself in their life more quickly than was wise. So take time and effort to really get to know a person, their character, background and motivations. And let them get to know the same about you. Test your capacity to resolve difficulties constructively and with mutual respect. Try to develop a realistic self awareness about your capacity to handle something unexpected in the relationship. And rather than diving in blindly, build your level of commitment commensurately with growth in these other things.

I don’t mean to say that any of this is foolproof. Relationships always involve an element of risk and vulnerability that can’t be entirely avoided. But these are some things that I think can help us to manage the risks more wisely.

Logged
gotbushels
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1586



« Reply #2 on: January 05, 2019, 08:44:18 AM »

itsmeSnap   Welcome new member (click to insert in post)

even with careful "vetting" of potential partners people seem to end up right back on BPD land.
This is a concern that comes up for people that are looking to date after a relationship with someone they think has BPD. Me too, I shared this concern. Lots of people here seem to.

Should I be on the lookout for people with BPD traits when meeting new people or just "whatever happens"?
I guess you mean 'or just let whatever happen, happens'. I think if you want a relationship with someone without BPD traits, then I think it helps to be adequately aware of what cues a person will give that may be related to BPD. I suggest you look at Characteristics of Healthy Relationships for some good suggestions. Maybe have enough that you're happy to protect yourself with, but not too many it becomes excessive. Recall that 90-95% of people don't have enough traits to have BPD.

Don't mean to make it sound like BPD is something "to be avoided", [... .]
If you want to avoid pwBPDs in your dating life, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. It's okay and probably a good thing if you want to date someone emotionally healthy.

There's quite a few examples of stories on Learning where people discuss their successful dating lives. Of course, if you read about 1 jarring story about a person dating a pwBPD, then dating 3 more after that--I discourage you from taking that as representative. I bet lots of people went on to successful dating (again, 90 to 95% of the population doesn't have BPD) and didn't post about it. 
Logged
Mustbeabetterway
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 633


« Reply #3 on: January 05, 2019, 08:59:32 AM »

Welcome new member (click to insert in post) itsmeSnap,

I think Sirnut has shared some excellent insights. I especially agree with this "rather than diving in blindly, build your level of commitment commensurately ".

I like gotbushels idea to look at the Characteristics of Healthy Relationships for suggestions.

I would add that I have worked on myself so that I will be healthier going into a new relationship.  

I have learned about personal boundaries developed through core values.  I have learned that one person cannot meet every need, nor should be expected to.  It's important not to expect another person to read your mind.  

Being an emotionally healthy person will increase the likelihood of a healthy relationship.

I am interested to hear what you and other members have learned from your experiences that could help you develop a healthier relationship?

Peace and blessings,

Mustbeabetterway
Logged
once removed
BOARD ADMINISTRATOR
**
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 12608



« Reply #4 on: January 05, 2019, 10:36:14 AM »

good feedback here!

a member here once said you dont learn to be a good fruit picker by learning how to spot bad fruit. 

if youre "on the lookout" for BPD traits, youll see them everywhere, in everything, even your own shadow. having said that, if im being honest, i think some hypervigilance early on is hard to avoid, just like its hard not to compare a new prospect to an old partner.

the key, i think is to learn (as we do on this board) the differences between pathological/disordered behavior, and every day, common, if dysfunctional relationship dynamics, and human nature. to gravitate to who/what you want in a relationship, and to grow to be the kind of person who can model that, as well as attract it.
Logged

     and I think it's gonna be all right; yeah; the worst is over now; the mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball…
itsmeSnap
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 458


"Tree of the young brave king"


« Reply #5 on: January 06, 2019, 12:12:06 AM »

Excerpt
to gravitate to who/what you want in a relationship, and to grow to be the kind of person who can model that, as well as attract it.

This is the "core" of my interest in this: I kinda want that intensity again.

And I know *most* people are not that intense, and within the intense category, BPD is prominent.

I was too shy growing up, I relied on intense people to have an excuse to get out of my shell: I was in a way allowing them to be a proxy to my own outgoing ways, I could "blame it on them" so to speak and not have to explain how I was so quiet and still wanting to go out and have fun.

A few times they let me tag along because others could/would not keep up with them, others because I was the one giving them an excuse: "I'm taking him out for once because he's so shy"

Now I'm not shy anymore and adult life means people just fall off the radar from work and families of their own. I still want that feeling of "whatever goes" that they have (we have? I also let go when I'm with people like that).

I don't care to be the "intense one" in the relationship, I want the "adventure" feeling that others' unexpected turns give me because I'm otherwise very good at making things "stable", as in, I get things done and set up systems to avoid problems in the future.

Which is why I'm kinda "conscious" about going back to a pwBPD being a distinct possibility, even though not seeking it directly.

Man this almost feels like admitting to a "guilty pleasure", but it is what it is.

Anyway, I'm reading about commitment/overinvestment being the key here. Can you be "very much into" (as in like the typical honeymoon phase) a relationship and still not be too invested? like "loving detachment", seek the relationship but not expect anything from it?

There's another thread asking about when is too soon to start dating and that got me thinking: how long is too soon to commit? how long is too long?

thanks for the comments guys, keep 'em coming  Welcome new member (click to insert in post)
Logged

Not all those who wander are lost
Mustbeabetterway
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 633


« Reply #6 on: January 06, 2019, 11:54:46 AM »

 :hi:Itsmesnap,

You pose some interesting questions.  I loved the excitement and intensity that my UBPDH brought to our relationship.  He could be intensely passionate about me, work, hobbies, and I admired that.  I would get caught up in whatever he was interested in because he was so passionate about it.

However, a lot of times, the excitement came from the drama and conflict  that he thrived on.  That is what eventually drove me from the relationship.

There was an article link here once, I will have to look for it.  It was about boundaries and the idea was to "be your own island". Other islands could be close to yours and people could visit your island, but ultimately you had to be responsible for yourself... .that was the gist. 

Like you, I like being a part of the adventures of my friends.  I have learned a lot through these shared experiences.  But, I also think you have to always work on developing your own interests and personality.  If you have a strong sense of self then you will likely not overinvest in another. 

That being said, from my observations, healthy relationships require, trust and openness and healthy commitment.

What are you doing to develop your own interests?

Mustbeabetterway

Logged
gotbushels
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1586



« Reply #7 on: January 07, 2019, 08:14:10 AM »

Man this almost feels like admitting to a "guilty pleasure", but it is what it is.
Well if you're honest with yourself in identifying your wants, the benefit is you get to learn something here at Learning. A lot of us on the boards--as Mustbeabetterway mentioned--enjoy excitement and some types of intensity.
This is the "core" of my interest in this: I kinda want that intensity again.
Can you be specific of what intensity interests you? Fights, sex, affection, drive, activity, danger?--so many things you can have as intense. From there, perhaps you may find a way to have the intensity you want without actually dating a pwBPD.


What are you doing to develop your own interests?
I'm also curious on what you'll share on this.


Can you be "very much into" (as in like the typical honeymoon phase) a relationship and still not be too invested?
This seems like a "can I have the goods/pleasure from a relationship and none of the pain/risk if I end it?"    I'm hoping to hear someone else come in on this.    
Logged
Mustbeabetterway
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 633


« Reply #8 on: January 07, 2019, 10:02:37 AM »

 Welcome new member (click to insert in post)

We might want to throw caution to the wind and dive into a new relationship, but it seems healthier to me to delay the immediate gratification of jumping into something new.  It’s difficult going backwards in relationships.  Getting to know someone little by little gives us time to check in with ourselves and see how we are feeling before we make the next step.

Mustbe
Logged
itsmeSnap
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 458


"Tree of the young brave king"


« Reply #9 on: January 07, 2019, 05:48:28 PM »

Hi everyone

Excerpt
What are you doing to develop your own interests?
I'm also curious on what you'll share on this.

I have a family business that I run, looking to expand it, part of the reason why I'm moving away: some family properties need development.

So that's my current job, I also want to explore video (lots of natural beauty there: surf beaches, old inactive volcano craters, wetlands with related fauna) as a hobby while I'm there.

I make a mean sourdough pizza  . I might try homebrewing, there's more of a "scene" there and the ingredients are available, but I know very little about it, only that it also uses yeast .

I studied engineering and occasionally delve back into it, I'm "too academic" at it (as In, very little actual on the job experience) so I just keep a website about it, pays for itself at least  needs maintenance though.

Anyway, my point is I have my life "in order" now other than relationships. No health problems, no financial issues, "dependable". Maybe "too dependable", which makes my immediate family rely on me to get things done a bit too much.

Excerpt
Can you be specific of what intensity interests you? Fights, sex, affection, drive, activity, danger?--so many things you can have as intense.

Affection, sex, drive, activity. Danger and fights not so much, though I can handle it quite well.

I guess I want someone to share my successes with that will also share their own with me. I guess I want someone to share their world with me and make it exciting.

"But snap" I hear you say, "Having a business is boring, and making food is not exactly exciting". Point taken, there's a long list of "things I'd like to do" that haven't been filled because I cant do them alone.

Sound like "I need someone to focus on", but I feel its more like someone to "let me be me", I want to go places and do things but I will not go alone, I tried that and its so depressing to just walk around taking pictures or trying stuff on your own. And if they have something for us to share as well then the better, because they'd be as excited that they also have someone to share their passion with.

I though I had that a few times before, but it didn't work because there was someone else and I ended up "third wheeling". Group things are a distinctly different experience, even if its just a +1.

Excerpt
This seems like a "can I have the goods/pleasure from a relationship and none of the pain/risk if I end it?"  Laugh out loud (click to insert in post)  I'm hoping to hear someone else come in on this

My gf seemed to manage that, just convince yourself you never actually loved them right?

But yeah, I guess I meant commitment as in pay the bills, move in, have a kid, that sort of stuff. I understand the commitment relationship wise is what's being discussed here, but if like you said that needs time to develop, I still don't want to reject someone just because I am not 100% sure I want it to be a long term thing, which is kinda what I noticed I've been doing so far.

Excerpt
perhaps you may find a way to have the intensity you want without actually dating a pwBPD.

Just for the record, I'm not looking to date a pwBPD specifically, but the things I look for have a distinct overlap. Which is why I asked if I *should* be on the lookout, which seems the consensus is "what is wrong with you?"   jk guys

Interested to know if we can come up with a way to do that. So far my winning strategy has been to greet intensity with intensity; it pushes more cautious people away, or they push me and I lose interest, but when someone reciprocates then the fireworks begin.

Is there a way to find an intense person that won't jump ship first chance? hard questions I know

Am I pipe dreaming, magical thinking, or detached from reality?
thoughts?
Logged

Not all those who wander are lost
gotbushels
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1586



« Reply #10 on: January 08, 2019, 08:11:03 AM »

Anyway, my point is I have my life "in order" now other than relationships.
That's heaps. Good on you.   

Maybe "too dependable", [... .]
To me--I'd rather be in the middle of dependent / independent, or have this issue you mentioned. I think it's a good issue to have because you're in a better position to give to a relationship, if you wanted to.

Affection, sex, drive, activity. Danger and fights not so much, though I can handle it quite well.
Well, I think a lot of people enjoy these things you mention. I think it could be a matter of dating until you find someone that fits what you want.

I though I had that a few times before, but it didn't work because there was someone else and I ended up "third wheeling".
I know this. I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting an intimate relationship, even if your life has plenty in it.

But yeah, I guess I meant [... .]commitment as in pay the bills, move in, have a kid, that sort of stuff.
It seems you want to enjoy a relationship without the long-term commitment things.
[... .] I am not 100% sure I want it to be a long term thing, which is kinda what I noticed I've been doing so far.
It also seems from this you want a short-term relationship with the option of long-term commitment. I think that's quite a normal way of dating today. I suppose it's perhaps seeing how the car (being the relationship) runs before you invest more into it? I think that's fair to want, perhaps even how most people run their relationships without being explicit about it.


Just for the record, I'm not looking to date a pwBPD specifically, but the things I look for have a distinct overlap.
Yes--even given your preferences--I think once removed's board analogy to you about picking fruit is still accurate.   I didn't get the 'what's wrong with you' impression though--your thread seems quite balanced.

Interested to know if we can come up with a way to do that.
My read of this is that you want a fairly normal relationship--to me that's good news, i.e., that people invest more when they like the relationship enough. It's good news because I think if you run enough iterations you'll find someone you like enough to get that relationship continuity (if you want it).

Your strategy seems fine to me.

Is there a way to find an intense person that won't jump ship first chance? hard questions I know
Why would an intense person jump ship first chance? I'm missing your assumption here.

Am I pipe dreaming, magical thinking, or detached from reality?
thoughts?
Your ideas and wants seem reasonable to me. Logically--yes there may be some bias of these intense things giving you more than 5-10% in the sample--but that wouldn't seem to me that, say, 50% of all intense people have BPD. I think we'd struggle to even push 15%; there's simply not that many BPDs to begin with. So there's no premises to me that establish that if you do find someone intense (in your specified areas), that person will probably have BPD traits.
Logged
Mustbeabetterway
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 633


« Reply #11 on: January 08, 2019, 08:25:45 AM »

There is a lot of food for thought here.  Reading through the discussion has caused me to think about what I want in a new relationship. 

I tend to be collaborative and adaptable (must be the Pisces in me ).  I think that draws me to intense people.


Mustbe
Logged
once removed
BOARD ADMINISTRATOR
**
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 12608



« Reply #12 on: January 08, 2019, 12:02:42 PM »

boiled down, do you think what youre looking for is a "passionate" relationship?
Logged

     and I think it's gonna be all right; yeah; the worst is over now; the mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball…
itsmeSnap
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 458


"Tree of the young brave king"


« Reply #13 on: January 08, 2019, 09:32:58 PM »

Excerpt
Why would an intense person jump ship first chance? I'm missing your assumption here.

I guess the fact that my gf just ran off on me when things didn't stay intense and she thought I didn't care anymore is still fresh, and also because I experienced something similar myself: my relationship with her was so good that I thought something must be wrong here, I'm missing something.

Took me three days to get over that, I needed some space, my gf caught on it and thought I left her for good. When I was ready she had already cut contact.

I also tend to just drop off the radar when things don't develop as intensely as I hoped, I also jump ship early, so there's that.

Excerpt
boiled down, do you think what youre looking for is a "passionate" relationship?

Yes, but its a "secure passion", as in, I don't care if we stay at the house all day to watch a movie marathon every once in a while or our only getaway of the season is grocery shopping, I want that at least she thinks its worth it to stay and that she also knows I ain't leaving.

Of course I also want some adventure in my life and I would take her along, but its not "adventure all day every day or bust", just that I feel that she won't run away or say she doesn't feel like going out, I can take care of the rest.

I just said I also run away when she's not as intense and now I'm saying I don't care if she doesn't want as much adventure  make up your mind snap 
Logged

Not all those who wander are lost
gotbushels
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 1586



« Reply #14 on: January 10, 2019, 09:07:51 AM »

Why would an intense person jump ship first chance? I'm missing your assumption here.
I guess the fact that my gf just ran off on me when things didn't stay intense [... .]

I needed some space, my gf caught on it and thought I left her for good.[... .]

I also tend to just drop off the radar when things don't develop as intensely as I hoped, I also jump ship early,
So it seems you disappeared without an explanation--then this partner does it back to you. Often we can expect what we give to a relationship; I think that's more true for relationships with nons than with a pwBPD--so it's important to remember what reciprocity looks like. Let's bring this back to your original question then.
Is there a way to find an intense person that won't jump ship first chance?
I think a good place to start is to find out why you're intense but jump ship. Then see if you can prevent that from happening in your future relationship--because if you don't have a reason to jump ship, then you'll give your reciprocal (the other person) less reason to jump ship. Does that make sense?


my relationship with her was so good that I thought something must be wrong here, I'm missing something.
I'm hoping someone will share thoughts on this.


I just said I also run away when she's not as intense and now I'm saying I don't care if she doesn't want as much adventure  make up your mind snap 
No worries. Sometimes we can have conflicting ideas about our relationships. I think it helps to inventory which ideas you want, which one works, which one you want to discard, compromise for yourself, etc. It's probably better to move forward on figuring this out now rather than when you're actually in the relationship--then change your mind. I think that has the benefit of making you more attractive, because even though ambivalence is good (shows being able to hold conflicting ideas), making a choice seems more an activation-based process. You'll probably also feel better because knowing what you want tends to give people clarity and a place to focus effort.
Logged
itsmeSnap
****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 458


"Tree of the young brave king"


« Reply #15 on: January 12, 2019, 05:09:19 AM »

Excerpt
So it seems you disappeared without an explanation--then this partner does it back to you

I did not disappear without explanation, I told her I was busy (which to be fair was true but also an excuse) and talked to her throughout but I took more time between contact than usual. the change of "routine" is what set her off probably.

Excerpt
it's important to remember what reciprocity looks like

I did not block her and forgot she ever existed, so escalation is more like it than reciprocity.

Excerpt
because if you don't have a reason to jump ship, then you'll give your reciprocal (the other person) less reason to jump ship. Does that make sense?

I think I'm going to start another thread on this to keep the replies relevant to the title
Logged

Not all those who wander are lost
Zemmma
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 171


« Reply #16 on: January 12, 2019, 05:55:56 AM »

Excerpt
Excerpt
But yeah, I guess I meant [... .]commitment as in pay the bills, move in, have a kid, that sort of stuff.
It seems you want to enjoy a relationship without the long-term commitment things.
. .

I am a little late on this, but I just wanted to comment. Why are "long term commitment things" always defined as paying bills, having children, and moving in? Is it not okay to want a long term, monogamous, passionate, supportive relationship without wanting those things? Not everyone's goal is marriage. So many of my friends interpret and define my desire for the relationship I actually want as "not wanting something as serious." Kind of drives me crazy. Just because I don't want what you want doesn't mean I'm not serious. Just because my end goal isn't sharing a house. Relationships can grow and develop and advance over time without the traditional milestones.

I am super serious about the love I want. I want a love so intense and committed that once I find my person they won't be able to imagine leaving me, and visa versa. Ever. I want the most intense passion and love on the planet. But I don't need or want to share a home with that person. I don't need that. I have already had and raised kids, I am financially independent. I have my own home that you are welcome to visit, but its mine. For me long term cohabitation turns a lover into a "brother" but a little distance a few times a week can keep things hot and steamy for years. And I spent more quality time with my lover than I did with my ex-husband who I lived with for decades. Living apart meant that I spent my time with him doing the fun things in life (including far more sex than my marriage afforded). I did my grocery shopping and paid bills on my own time- that sort of thing never got in the way of our fun and love.

Marriage is an old model, and though it worked for me once and works for many (and that's great!), it is not the only way to show love and long term commitment. It is also very risky. It's a business arrangement and binding legal contract that requires you to bet half of your life's assets on the hope that your love will last forever.

Logged
Zemmma
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 171


« Reply #17 on: January 12, 2019, 07:42:48 AM »

Sorry for the marriage rant! Back to your original question: Sure, you know the signs to look for and will be able to assess if things are toxic and pathological a lot sooner next time. At first, people are confused by traits and behaviours in these relationships- we don't know what is happening. We are confused, we feel we have been misunderstood. I don't think it will take you so long to spot them a second time around. You won't have to be super vigilant. It's not like the damaging traits and behaviours are subtle.

And as for the intensity. I understand why you crave it. The intensity is alluring. Love should feel intense and overwhelming in a good way. One way I comfort myself about that, is looking at the people on this board. Presumably most of us don't have a PD. Many of us don't want drama, but we've sure stuck around for some! We've all been deeply in love or we wouldn't be here. So many of us talk about the depth of connection and the intensity, passion and excitement of these relationships. I have to assume that we brought some of this fun, excitement and adventure to the table. I think I have even learned from my ex with BPD, about passion and intensity. I can take some of that to my next relationship. We all want the good, intoxicating parts of these relationships (sex, excitement, adventure) without all of the negative aspects (inconsistency, devaluation, discard, turmoil, darkness, jealousy, persecution). So many of us (and presumably many people everywhere) want all the good stuff and will be open to and part of creating that. It's not only people with BPD who can provide you with the things you want in your next relationship.
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!