Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
July 10, 2025, 05:15:39 AM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Things I couldn't have known
Emotional Blackmail: Fear, Obligation and Guilt (FOG)
Am I the Cause of Borderline Personality Disorder?
Escaping Conflict and the Karpman Drama Triangle
I think it's Borderline Personality Disorder, but how can I know?
90
BPDFamily.com
>
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
>
Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
> Topic:
Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes (Read 728 times)
Mr. Dake
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 41
Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
on:
April 10, 2019, 04:33:36 AM »
Here's the update on our 16 year-old daughter: at the end of the marking period she is failing her classes. So much so that I'm not sure that it will be possible to pass any of them this semester. Her emotional distress is such that she's out of the classroom much of the time and not completing assignments. Her three-year IEP meeting is tomorrow. She is in a substantially separate, therapeutic classroom in the public school system. The evaluation for her IEP renewal demonstrates the level of her emotional distress and difficulty with behavior. Her intelligence is in the average range, which we've known isn't the concern. Its feel impossible to know what will help her. It also feels that the school is as at as much of a loss as we are. It's hard for me to see any of the recommendations from the psychologist helping. After attending a workshop for youth with disabilities attending college, her program was supportive when I expressed that I did not see her as being able to be successful at college or work without staying in the school's program from ages 18 -22. I'll give an update following the IEP meeting tomorrow.
Logged
Our objective
is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to
learn the skills
to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
FaithHopeLove
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Shaky
Posts: 1606
Re: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
Reply #1 on:
April 10, 2019, 06:20:26 AM »
Thanks for the update. Mr. Dake. It is hard to know what to do when nothing seems to be helping. That must be very frustrating. It sounds like your daughter does have support though. Her program supports her and so do you so there is hope. I will look forward to hearing more about the IEP meeting.
Logged
Harri
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Parent
Posts: 5981
Re: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
Reply #2 on:
April 11, 2019, 04:59:28 PM »
Hi
Mr. Dake
.
I want to second what
FaithHopeLove
said about your daughter having a source of support from you.
Excerpt
her program was supportive when I expressed that I did not see her as being able to be successful at college or work without staying in the school's program from ages 18 -22
It is good to hear they re supportive in this. What a difficult thing to have to come to accept though. what are your thoughts about it?
Logged
"What is to give light must endure burning." ~Viktor Frankl
Only Human
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: divorced since the 90's
Posts: 1027
Love is still the answer
Re: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
Reply #3 on:
April 12, 2019, 12:33:03 AM »
Hi Mr. Dake
How'd the IEP meeting go today?
~ OH
Logged
"It's our god forsaken right to be loved, loved, loved, loved."
-Jason Mraz, I'm Yours
stampingt1
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 108
Re: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
Reply #4 on:
April 12, 2019, 02:50:39 AM »
Mr. Dake,
Sorry that she is failing her classes. Does she need an associate/para educator? Hope the IEP meeting went well. Please keep us updated!
My DS 18 isn't been to school in 10 days due to anxiety & 1 day due to the flu. We are weighing our options. Think he will be upset not graduating w/ his classmates. However, he missed all of last school year due to these darn health issues. Been to 4 different hospitals in 3 states for his ailments, which are anxiety, depression, possible ibs w/ constipation, possible BPD or possible temporal lobe seizures. I am so ready for some REAL answers!
Stampingt1
Logged
Mr. Dake
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 41
Re: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
Reply #5 on:
April 15, 2019, 04:22:38 AM »
I apologize for the late response. Our daughter's IEP meeting went as well as possible. She's in a supportive environment: the Sped Director, Principle, guidance counselor, teachers, and therapist are great. The good news is that she has a chance to complete her Junior year by passing her classes this semester and attending summer school. This has given her hope as she's worked in school since the meeting. In response to a previous question, there is a para in her classroom, along with two teachers, and a therapist for seven students.
Saturday is my one day off and we spent it at an outlet mall so that she could spend time with a friend from her social skills group. Our daughter was happy, stated that we should do this more often, and I responded that we could as I was able to walk and read (my wife gave me a Fitbit for my birthday last week and I'm walking 10,000 - 12,000 steps a day).
Also, we were going out to Moe's for dinner last evening with my older daughter and son-in-law. Our younger daughter wanted to eat at Moe's and get frozen yogurt. When I responded that we went out on Saturday, were going out to eat Sunday, and that I didn't want to pay for a dinner and for a separate dessert, she angrily was going to not come. She had no keys to get into the house When she returned to the car, and I calmly said that I wanted to get to a win/win, she and my wife agreed to share a meal, so that we were purchasing 4 meals versus 5 and she got fro yo. We had an enjoyable evening as a family and both her and my needs were met.
So, I'm feeling encouraged on both the school and home fronts.
Logged
FaithHopeLove
Retired Staff
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Shaky
Posts: 1606
Re: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
Reply #6 on:
April 15, 2019, 05:51:55 AM »
I am so glad things are going well. You are doing a great job.
Logged
Mirsa
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 114
Re: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
Reply #7 on:
April 15, 2019, 06:17:47 PM »
Sounds like all good steps. One day at a time. And yes, cases like your daughter's are a challenge for schools, even with the IEP and a good team. There's no easy answers and no quick fixes with children like these. So glad you feel the school is supportive. That's a big help.
Logged
stampingt1
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 108
Re: Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
«
Reply #8 on:
April 17, 2019, 02:09:15 AM »
Mr. Dake,
Glad that DD has a chance of passing her junior year & it sounds like she has lots of support at school.
Stampingt1
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
>
Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
> Topic:
Our 16 year-old Daughter is Failing Her Classes
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...