Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
April 20, 2025, 10:38:33 PM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
EyesUp
,
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Things we can't afford to ignore
Depression: Stop Being Tortured by Your Own Thoughts
Surviving a Break-up when Your Partner has BPD
My Definition of Love. I have Borderline Personality Disorder.
Codependency and Codependent Relationships
89
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time)
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time) (Read 550 times)
WindofChange
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Single
Posts: 249
No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time)
«
on:
May 06, 2019, 01:23:34 PM »
We ended things yesterday. He was, of course, pretty upset. He blocked me on social media (I was going to block him but he beat me to it). I haven't blocked him on my phone yet, but I will if he texts or calls. I don't know how to block in my email. I still have my old AOL account. Not sure if there's anything I can do other than have it go to spam folder -- but I have to check that occasionally since I'm job hunting.
I'm relieved but feel really exhausted. Guess it's just all part of the process. Maybe I should go ahead and block him on my phone. I feel like I should text him and let him know and explain that it's just for the best. Is an explanation necessary? Maybe not. I don't know.
Logged
Be kind always.
WindofChange
WindofChange
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Single
Posts: 249
Re: No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time)
«
Reply #1 on:
May 06, 2019, 01:50:22 PM »
A good Pinterest quote on detachment:
"Detachment doesn't mean not caring. It's taking care of yourself first and letting others take responsibility for their actions without trying to save or punish them."
Working on not feeling compelled to jump in and "save" an adult who got themselves in a predicament through their own actions.
Logged
Be kind always.
WindofChange
Beneck
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 105
Brave heart. Braver brain.
Re: No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time)
«
Reply #2 on:
May 07, 2019, 04:38:36 PM »
Hey Wind of Change! How is it going?
Logged
once removed
BOARD ADMINISTRATOR
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 12835
Re: No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time)
«
Reply #3 on:
May 07, 2019, 05:04:27 PM »
Quote from: WindofChange on May 06, 2019, 01:23:34 PM
I feel like I should text him and let him know and explain that it's just for the best. Is an explanation necessary?
when you ended things, what happened? what was said? anything about space or not speaking?
Logged
and I think it's gonna be all right; yeah; the worst is over now; the mornin' sun is shinin' like a red rubber ball…
Lucky Jim
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 6211
Re: No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time)
«
Reply #4 on:
May 08, 2019, 01:08:55 PM »
Excerpt
I feel like I should text him and let him know and explain that it's just for the best. Is an explanation necessary? Maybe not. I don't know.
Hey WofC, In my view, no explanation is necessary. Do what's best for you! I find it normal to require distance after parting ways with someone. It's painful, I know, but leads to greater happiness, so hang in there. Suggest you be kind to yourself.
LJ
Logged
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.
George Bernard Shaw
WindofChange
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Single
Posts: 249
Re: No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time)
«
Reply #5 on:
May 08, 2019, 01:13:43 PM »
Hi, Once removed and Lucky Jim. Sunday is when it happened. Basically, he sensed me pulling away and called me on it. I didn't go see him that day because I wasn't feeling well (I really wasn't). He didn't accept that explanation and was upset because it was his birthday. He kept texting me and saying if I wanted to see him I would have. He asked me if I wanted to end things and I told him that I did. I told him I knew I didn't give him what he needed and that I was sorry we had gone back and forth so much. I had just been unable to say goodbye. His response was, well happy effing birthday to me. Then I messaged his friend about making sure he was taking his medicine, and he texted something about the fact that I had a lot of nerve contacting his friend about him. My response was, so what? And that was the end of the communication. Then later that evening I noticed he had blocked me on social media. So...maybe I just don't attempt to contact him. I think if he contacts me anymore, then I'll just politely tell him it's best that we don't communicate at all. Thanks for your responses. I know this is the right step to take in ending things. I feel differently now than I have in the past. I know it's for the best, and I feel my eyes have been opened to things I didn't want to see before. I also have totally reached my limit and I'm just ready to move on.
Logged
Be kind always.
WindofChange
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
>
Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
> Topic:
No Contact -- Day 1 (Determined to make it stick this time)
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...